Jets Fan: Honey, you seen my keys?

Wife: They’re in the drawer.

Jets Fan: Why do you always put them in the drawer? I use ‘em every day! Now I gotta go open the drawer every freakin’ time!

Wife: Oh, you’ll live.

Jets Fan: We’ll have words, woman.

(phone rings)

Jets Fan: Huh. I don’t recognize that number. Eh, what the hey. I’ll answer it.

(flip phone flies open)

(more…)