If you think June is too early to be talking about fantasy football, then fuck you. It’s never too early to get into the stats and trends. Although, May probably is too early. But, it’s never too early to get your league together, just to make sure you get your group set and do all the admin bullsh so it doesn’t interfere with your draft prep.

Some of you may already be wondering: is KSK starting a fantasy league this year?

Yes, we are.

A keeper league, no less. And we want one of you to join us. But if you want in, you’ve gotta try out. We’re looking for a commenter that knows the roto** game, and will hold his or her own in a 14-team keeper league.

This is the group of 13 that we have so far. I think you’ll agree that the list is long and distinguished, like my johnson:

Yours Truly

Big Daddy Drew

Christmas Ape

Unsilent “The Maj” Majority

Flubby

Will Leitch

Rob “Combudsman” Iracane

Dan Shanoff

Awful Announcing

Jamie Mottram

Dan “Steinz” Steinberg

J.E. Skeets

D.J. Gallo

We’re still hashing out the rules** for the league, so don’t ask. As for how you apply, the only rule is that there are no rules. You can submit an original pic, your shitty photoshop work, or even something you wrote. We don’t care what you send in, provided that it’s original and illustrates your badassery in some respectable manner.

Submit your artistry to kissingsuzykolber@gmail.com, and send as many entries as you want. The better entries will be posted here on our site. The best entry will get a team in our league. The shitty entries will earn you nothing but scorn.

So if you think you can hang with this cadre, get your entries into us by June 30.

**We ARE doing head-to-head scoring.

Oh c’mon, you didn’t expect us to take a week off without holding a little draft fun, now, did you? Lord knows you folks have earned it. Frankly, I’m stunned and delighted you folks cared that much. After all, reading KSK and NOT reading at all are fairly similar endeavors. To wormfather, otto man, grimey, and the rest of you fabulous KSK commenters out there, thanks for sticking around during a week where we were determined to not do anything at all.

This week’s draft: Bands You Would Like To Have Been The Frontman For. Yes, I just dangled a preposition. Suck my balls. The rules: You can pick any band from any spot in time. This may not be your favorite band, just the band that would promise the awesomest life experience should you be the lucky asshole who fronted it. You sung. And possibly played the lead guitar. You did all the coke. And you accidentally nailed all the tranny groupies. If your frontman died young, so did you. Hip hop bands welcome. No solo artists. Once you pick a band, you must wait 10 picks to select another.

My first pick, of course, is Led Zeppelin. They aren’t my favorite band. But who passes up the chance to violate women with a mud shark like Robert Plant did? No one, that’s who.

And if you can name the band above, you get to bypass the 10-choice rule to make your next pick. But beware: I’ll be picking them very soon. Because they fucking rule.

And if you pick REM, you are a fucking pussy.