What the fuck does he mean, “Guilty?” Hey, hey, judge! Can I get a replay on this motherfucker? How come you didn’t put me in jail when I killed those whitefolks? Shit, after y’all let me off for that, I just figured I could do whatever I wanted! The fuck happened? Did Fred Goldman put you up to this? That guy’s had it in for me since his kid ran off with my bitch! Fred? Aw, you really got me, Fred! You big kidder! Way to go! You’ll get another MSNBC special for this one, buddy!

Oh, yeah, get those cuffs on me! Haha, good one Freddy! You really got me! Whoa! Hey, those cuffs are kinda tight, fella! Okay, fun’s over. Come on, if we get outta here now we still get nine holes in. Hey, stop pushing me, fool! What the– HEY COME ON! GET THESE FUCKING CUFFS OFF ME! YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME! I’M THE JUICE! I WAS A SPOKESMAN FOR HERTZ! I’M GONNA BEAT YOUR ASSES WITH MY DINGO LEG IF YOU DON’T ME OUT OF HERE!!!!

Shit, maybe I really am going to jail…