Official Best Steelers Season Ever Checklist

[x] Avenge playoff loss to Jaguars in Jacksonville
[x] Destroy the Redskins in Raljon, MD with 30,000 Steelers fans in attendance
[x] Beat the shithead Ravens
[x] Beat the shithead Ravens twice
[x] Beat the shithead Ravens thrice MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
[x] Curb-stomp the Greatriots in Foxboro
[x] Defeat the Cowboys on a Romo pick-six
[x] Extend winning streak over Browns to 11
[x] End the annoying Chargers fluke of being 0-13 in Pittsburgh in the regular season but 2-0 in the playoffs
[x] Finally win a goddamn AFC Championship Game at home
[x] Win a record sixth Super Bowl title, this time in a thrilling game over a hyped-up underdog, with Roethlisberger forever silencing critics with game-winning drive
[x] Do it all without an offensive line and with an insanely difficult schedule
[x] Masturbate furiously

Special thanks to haters everywhere. You make this at least 8 to 12 percent more enjoyable.

AND MY PARROT FRIEND CAME BACK!

He got a little out of hand with some of the other fans, however.

Yes, the already ubiquitous Steelers fans are breeding, producing offspring indoctrinated into the polkatared ways of Steeler Nation.

Also, someone at the bar had a Cleatus action figure, which they claim was a Secret Santa gift. It almost ruined my day. Almost.

No Ben, that’s not a Choco Taco. Give it back to Santonio for quick bong manufacture.

I liked the part where the announcers pretended that Joe Flacco is a decent NFL quarterback. I mean, when they make a big deal about you completing four passes in a row for the first time in three games, perhaps you need some work.

To the Ratbirds credit, they executed the “hurt the player that’s most effective against us and allow pass interference penalties to put us on the 1″ strategy to a tee. I was sweating it for a while. Credit to the Ravens for giving the Steelers three nailbiters this year. HOW VERY KIND OF TO YOU LOSE ALL THREE AS WELL!

The team should have listened to Hines. Rimas Sweed is wolst tarr leceivel evel. Maybe he should just stick to laying out Corey Ivy.

Yes, Mike. Santonio can make an awesome bong out of it.

And even though Hines got hurt early on, his Asiatic friends were still pleased with the outcome.

Finally, here’s the dorkiest shirt I saw in the inaugural rally before the game by a healthy margin.

Bring it, Buzzsaw boy. You and your iPhone.