NO MAILBAG THIS WEEK.

However, we will offer alternative programming: send us your angry fantasy football rants about this season, with a focus on the gut-wrenching loss that knocked you out of the playoffs or kept you from reaching them. Make the subject line “Fantasy Football Bitching”. The best three submissions will be posted on Thursday, and the winners will get… ummm… a small sense of accomplishment?

When we sold this website to Uproxx media back in May, we were promised complete and utter creative autonomy, while retaining copyright ownership of everything we wrote. Well, it turns out that, in return for such a deal, Uproxx wants to SELL ADVERTISING AND USE THE SITE AS PART OF SOME SORT OF PROFIT SCHEME!

I can’t believe it! THAT WASN’T PART OF THE DEAL, RAWKUS! THAT WASN’T PAAAAART!

Wait a second.

/looks at deal

Oh, wait. Yes, yes it was part of the deal. In fact, it would seem to occupy the bulk of the language in the deal. Well, I’ll be.

Anyway, so there are ads now. It won’t affect any of the site content. We promise. By the way, would you like to purchase official Brett Favre Jets Jerseys? Brett Favre Jets Jerseys are Available! Shop the Official NFL Online Store at www.NFLshop.com!

See? Won’t change a goddamn thing.

NOTE: Get all your dopey jokes about specific ads out in this thread, people. Because, after that, any and all “Hey, that match.com girl is hawt!” comments get fucking axed.

Good morning, fair readers. You may have noticed that the URL address insists that this site is now hosted on something called “uproxx” instead of our throwback blogspot address. You’ll also notice that everything looks pretty much the same, and the same will be true for our content: still lots of swearing, animal death-porn, and cheerleader cupcake on Fridays, plus the same formulaic imagined theater from your favorite KSKharacters that everyone loves so much.

Although visitors will be redirected automatically to our new URL, it may be wise to update your RSS feed and/or bookmarks.

So, why the change? Well, think of it as a particularly moving episode of Extreme Makeover: Blog Edition. We loved the way our old place looked, but this new site (constructed by that stupid-haired fucker with the annoying voice, the sensitive guy with glasses, and those two hot chicks) gives us special features that help our dysfunctional family live more comfortably. Drew has a special “applause room” where his petulant thirst for attention is sated, Christmas Ape and I have an on-site anger management counselor, the basement is outfitted with a troupe of actors ready to act out The Aristocrats for Punter, flubby got the wax museum he’s always wanted, and there are extra foot stools everywhere for the Maj.

We don’t think there are too many bugs to work out, but if there are, thanks for your patience. Or fuck you. Whatever makes you feel more at home here.

/dies inside

But fear not. For those of you who were new to the whole KSK hate train just this season (and Sitemeter indicates you number in the 10′s of 10′s!), you should know that the offseason mantra of KSK remains: Football season may be over, BUT DICK JOKE SEASON IS ALL YEAR ROUND.

To that end, we’ve got plenty in store for you during these offseason doldrums:

-Regular posting every weekday, as always
-More Wade & Jerry adventures
-The return of Kill Kill Kill
-The return of Better Know A Draft Pick
-The return of KSK mock drafts and KSK commenter drafts
-The return of KSK off topic. Get your towels ready
-Pictures of Drew, possibly drunk
-Drew goes to Vegas, loses assload of money
-More cheerleader posts
-More Osi Umenyiora poop jokes
-More hate
-More Marmalard
-More evenings out with Silky Garrard
-Michael Vick’s letters from prison
-More bukkake

Also, later on this year, we may be leaving our home here on Blogger and migrating to a new platform that’s all our own. And yes, it’ll have ads. It costs lots of money to pay those goddamn manatees to come up with this shit. Bout time we got back in the black. Otherwise, we won’t be changing a goddamn thing. We won’t be growing or developing as writers or human beings in any way, shape or form. That’s a guarantee.

So strap in. Or strap it on. We’re hurtling full bore into this shit. YEAAAARRRGHHHHH!

Last week we published our 1000th post on this here blog. To commemorate the occasion, we talked about writing up a special post acknowledging the feat — the kind of post that looks back on the fun we’ve had and counts up all the readers who have come by, yadda yadda yadda. Naturally, because we’re all lazy and found the topic uninspiring, nobody actually followed through.

But y’know, with it being a second-tier holiday and all today, we thought we’d take a moment to say, “Yay, us!” and thank all you nice people for reading. We appreciate all of you, from the most devoted commenters to the casual readers who just skim for a Big Daddy Drew byline. The latter stings, but we understand.

We’ll return to our regular programming tomorrow. Please drink responsibly at work.

And that’s not all. Thought Fridays during the NFL season belonged to that prick fuck over on Page 2? WRONG. Ufford’s about to get all up in his ass with his own weekly piece over at AOL FanHouse. Say hello to… The Prelude.

Actually, it’s not a Honda Prelude that the name refers to. It’s based on some poem I’ve never read and never will.

Finally, the bukkake doesn’t end today. No, no, no. KSK is taking over Deadspin this entire weekend. So be sure to click on over to the mothership on Saturday and Sunday for live football updates, tit shots, and more. The NFL is back, my friends. And so are the dick jokes.

Special thanks to Dan V for the artwork. AND to Punter for the Prelude visual.

This week, we’re holding the first annual KsK Kares Charity Drive for Fisher House, which supports disabled veterans and their families. You can donate directly to FH here.