“A padlock attached to a belt? Damn, and here I am using a Moët bottle like a chump.” –Antonio Cromartie

 
Authorities say NFL trash talk led to the murder of a Florida prison inmate. Willie Smith reportedly taunted fellow inmate Vincent Lee, repeatedly shouting “Dolphins suck!” The next morning, Lee exacted his revenge:

Lee entered Smith’s cell with a padlock attached to a black belt and hit Smith in the head. Lee had a one-and-a-half foot shiv in his waistband, though it’s not clear if he used the weapon. Lee was able to clean up much of the blood and flushed a sheet down a toilet before being detained by guards. Smith died eight days later.

Yikes. At least he tidied up after himself. That’s got to be worth some good-behavior credit towards an early release.

Also, he flushed a whole sheet? What kind of plumbing do they have in that prison? I’m a law abiding citizen and whenever I take so much as a second lap around the Chinese buffet, I know I’m going to have to get the plunger out later on. Meanwhile this jailbird can flush a 1982 VW Vanagon with impunity. Where’s the justice in that?

But I digress…

The murder took place on October 16, a few days after Miami’s exciting victory over the Jets on Monday Night Football. Under those circumstances it seems like Lee could have been a little more self-possessed towards his tormentor. You know, just a simple retort of “Scoreboard, bitch” or, if necessary, go upside the head once and be done with it. But I suppose that if patience and circumspection had been Lee’s strong suits, he never would’ve been in the calabozo to begin with.

[ Miami New Times via digg ]

Former Super Bowl hero Plaxico Burress was reportedly met by a number of jeers and catcalls from fellow inmates when he was taken to Riker’s Island prison to begin serving his sentence for weapons violations. This isn’t too surprising considering Burress’ notoriety and the high-profile criminal case against him. KSK has more than a few readers inside NYC’s “sixth borough” and they shared some of the comments directed toward Burress yesterday.

“You’re a dead man. This is the world’s largest concentration of Jets fans.”

“Any man who drops a pass spends a night in the box.”

“The Michigan State Alumni Group meets on Tuesdays at 2:45, near the basketball courts.”

“I must admit I didn’t think much of Plaxico first time I laid eyes on him. He might’a been important on the outside, but in here he was just a little turd in prison grays. Looked like a stiff breeze could blow him over. That was my first impression of the man.”

“Charlatan!!!”

“Don’t worry, you can still make regular visits to LQ. Locked-up Queens, that is!”