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	<title>Kissing Suzy Kolber &#187; nfl rulebook</title>
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	<description>KSK is a humor site dedicated solely to the NFL.</description>
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		<title>Some Of The Proposed NFL Rules Changes Not Getting A Lot Of Press</title>
		<link>http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2008/02/some-of-proposed-nfl-rules-changes-not.html</link>
		<comments>http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2008/02/some-of-proposed-nfl-rules-changes-not.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Feb 2008 12:29:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Monday Morning Punter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Joe Gibbs is the devil]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MMP]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nfl rulebook]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[With the NFL&#8217;s scouting combine in Indianapolis (which we&#8217;ve already established is an awesome city), there&#8217;s only so much coverage one can digest of the league&#8217;s competition committee meetings, which [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_P_Wj_L6IyI4/R8K6onLIgeI/AAAAAAAAAaU/3NUmeUv7uZc/s1600-h/combine.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer;" src="http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_P_Wj_L6IyI4/R8K6onLIgeI/AAAAAAAAAaU/3NUmeUv7uZc/s400/combine.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5170900529047962082" border="0" /></a>
<p>With the NFL&#8217;s scouting combine in Indianapolis (which we&#8217;ve <a href="http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2007/01/indianapolis-has-momentary-lapse-in.html">already</a> <a href="http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2007/10/drecksonville-vs-crapapolis-who-ya-got.html">established</a> is <a href="http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2008/01/breaking-indys-new-dome-already-f-ked.html">an</a> <a href="http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2007/09/ksk-2007-nfl-season-prekakke.html">awesome</a> <a href="http://kissmesuzy.blogspot.com/2007/09/ksk-kickoff-bukkake-reporting-live-from.html">city</a>), there&#8217;s only so much coverage one can digest of the league&#8217;s competition committee meetings, which are transpiring at the same time. The big proposal getting the attention is one that would <a href="http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news?slug=jc-compcommittee021808&amp;prov=yhoo&amp;type=lgns">allow</a> defensive players to be wired for sound, much like the quarterbacks were allowed to be this past season.</p>
<p>However, this is only one of the rules revisions that have been suggested for the 2008 season. There are a slew of other rules packages being considered for implementation. Some of the other suggested changes brought to the committee include:</p>
<p>- Changing the name of the 2-minute warning to &#8220;The Joe Gibbs Memorial Game Mismanagement Zone.&#8221;</p>
<p>- A ball carrier&#8217;s forward progress would be considered stopped if the defender in contact with him has had a felony arrest since 2004. </p>
<p>- Defensive face masks would be legal if the offending player can be heard screaming, &#8220;Fuck yo mama,&#8221; or any interpretable derivative therein.</p>
<p>- Quarterbacks would be allowed to ground the ball inside the tackle box if it can be determined that his uniform has a distinct stain of urine.</p>
<p>- Wide receivers&#8217; pushing off to be called more scrupulously, unless said wide receiver&#8217;s first name rhymes with &#8220;Craphonzo.&#8221;</p>
<p>- Offensive players would be forbidden to rape within 72 hours of kickoff. For defensive players, however, it would be 36 hours.</p>
<p>- Referee&#8217;s signal for &#8220;Delay of game&#8221; to be changed to vigorous underhanded motion at belt-buckle level.</p>
<p>These are just the ones we&#8217;ve heard about. If you know of any others, please pass them along in the comments.</p>
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		<title>Sudden Death: Best Recourse For Old People Inner-City Orphans NFL Overtime Games</title>
		<link>http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/03/sudden-death-best-recourse-for-old.html</link>
		<comments>http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/03/sudden-death-best-recourse-for-old.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Mar 2007 12:14:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Monday Morning Punter</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[MMP]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[nfl rulebook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[take your pinko chickenshit values elsewhere]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[I fucking love the NFL&#8217;s overtime format. It&#8217;s rigid and unforgiving, like my cock. It also rocks your face, but maybe you just don&#8217;t know it yet, maybe because you&#8217;re [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_P_Wj_L6IyI4/RgEi7kM50_I/AAAAAAAAABQ/hMLM5ILVHLA/s1600-h/youregonnadie.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/blogger/_P_Wj_L6IyI4/RgEi7kM50_I/AAAAAAAAABQ/hMLM5ILVHLA/s320/youregonnadie.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5044351464357090290" /></a><br />I fucking love the NFL&#8217;s overtime format. It&#8217;s rigid and unforgiving, like my cock.  It also rocks your face, but maybe you just don&#8217;t know it yet, maybe because you&#8217;re too busy thinking about the homeless. You&#8217;re always thinking about the gaddamned homeless; can&#8217;t you see that THEY WANT TO BE POOR!?!?</p>
<p>Some of you assholes act like winning the coin flip wins the game. Not fucking so, though I&#8217;d say if you can&#8217;t correctly identify an outcome that has a 50 percent chance of happening, your ineptitude has no place in mock combat. </p>
<p>Anyway, even if you&#8217;re in OT and you lose the toss, you still kick off and have a chance to pin the other team deep. You can still stop your opponents on defense. And even if you fuck that up, they still can block the candy-assed 27-yard field goal attempt that will win the game. </p>
<p>&#8220;But it would be MORE FAIR if both teams got the ball,&#8221; you would mutter through your vagigi as you hang your Che Guevara out the window of your studio apartment to air dry. </p>
<p>Yeah, so those ten or twelve possessions your team had in regulation, wasn&#8217;t that fair? What about not banishing the special teams units to the sideline to reprise the same pivotal role they played during regulation. Wouldn&#8217;t that be fair? </p>
<p>Some of you are just in love with the Gay Circus Overtime they use in the college game, because each team gets a turn on the top AND the bottom. We saw a gay circus at the start of the Super Bowl, and most of us can safely agree what a colossal failure that was. </p>
<p><span style="font-style:italic;">Your views and improvements for OT are welcome in the comments. </span></p>
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		<slash:comments>48</slash:comments>
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