(Hasbrouck Heights, New Jersey, 1950)

Little Timmy: I’ll trade ya a Joey D card for your Babe Ruth jersey!

Little Johnny: Are you crazy?! That’s the Babe’s old jersey, Timmy! Keep dreamin’. Besides, my old man says this Mantle fella will be ten times the player Joey D ever was!

Little Timmy: Your old man is drinkin’ Tiger Eye at the docks again!

Little Johnny: Heyyyy, we’ll have words, tough guy!

Little Vinny: Hey you guys! You put those marbles down and come play some stickball with us! You don’t come now, you’ll have to watch us from the stoop of old man Palermo’s shop!

Little Johnny: Okay, but this time, any ball that hits Palermo’s sign count as a homer!

Little Vinny: Oh, fine.

Little Johnny: And little Duane can’t play!

Little Vinny: Don’t worry about it. I heard his ma took him to the aquarium today. We won’t have to worry about him!

(ground rumbles)

Little Johnny: What was that? You hear that, Vinny?

Little Vinny: I did! You hear that, Timmy?

Little Timmy: I did! What could it be?

(playground flies open)

Read the rest of this entry »

What’s even better than another hi-larious video from LSUFreek? A hi-larious video from LSUFreek on a Monday morning when we have dick all ready to post. Enjoy, kids.

If you were wondering why these guys look so happy just continue after the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

From Who Datting commenter TurleyGirlie, a tale in parking lot rubishness she captured prior to last Saturday’s win over the Buzzsaw.

For some reason, I thought y’all would love this. We saw this as we were walking into the game from our tailgating spot. The thought process of the tards that tailgated here:

Also? I woulda done the same damn thing. What were they going to do? Leave and get it fixed? Hell no.

Well, of course. It’s not like anything ever gets fixed in New Orleans anyway.

In keeping with the contributions from Saints fans, here’s LSUFreek’s gif of Kurt Warner’s destruction at the hands of the Who Dats.

Read the rest of this entry »

Christmas is a time for being stressed out by relatives, with alcohol your only merciful bulwark against madness. Or throwing them the Coach Haley holiday greeting. Already faced with that, you expect us to work too? Not so long as we have good seasonal content to recycle. Feel like bitching? Just be thankful you’re not in Sweden, where those blond assholes go nuts for a stupid cartoon with Donald Duck in the jungle.

Also, George Michael died. No, not that one. Or that one. This one. D.C. mourns its machine.

Read the rest of this entry »

One of the more head-scratching plays on Sunday was Mark Sanchez diving at the knees of lead blocker Jonathan Vilma on Darren Sharper’s 99-yard pick-six. Sanchez was the last Jet with a shot of making a tackle, so it’s unclear what exactly Sanchez had in mind besides destroying the knee ligaments of a franchise linebacker.

So congrats to Mark for living up to his Dirty Sanchez nickname. Let’s agree to call this move “the chimichanga.”

UPDATE: That’s a $5000 chimichanga. Spicy!

(thanks, freek!)

Matt Millen, whom sinister forces have once again installed in an NFL announcing booth (even if it craptastic NFL Network), is claiming he’s being unfairly scapegoated for the myriad foul-ups he oversaw as general manager of the Lions. Y’know, all the ones that are completely and without question his fault.

“I don’t go backwards,” Millen said. “I just don’t think like that. There’s nothing I can do about [Detroit]. All I can do is from here on out. I understand. In Detroit, they need a bad guy. I was a bad guy. I was to blame for the fall of the auto industry and the housing market. Somehow, I had something to do with [Detroit mayor] Kwame Kilpatrick [resigning], although I’m not sure what. But that’s what happens when you lose in this game. You give everyone a cheap and easy story to jump on.”

And nobody messes with the bad guy, eh chico. You little cockaroach. Not when he oozes so much machismo. All these pinche pendejos in the NFL, they want a piece of the bad guy. I’m the main mang. Hey, booth attendant, look after my mashismo. Something happens to it, something gonna happen to you.

Thanks again inimitable LSUfreek.

While you’re clicking “refresh” for this week’s Monday Afternoon Quarterbacking of Monday Morning Quarterback (Drew’s on vacation this week, so Punter’s filling in), here are some lovely creations from master of the Interwebs LSUfreek.  Like most Saints fans, freek has a justifiable love of Drew Brees, but I don’t know about these Photoshops.  I mean, I’ll allow that Brees might be the second coming of Christ, but healing Reggie Bush?  I doubt it.

Read the rest of this entry »

Twitter is a hot white piece of Internet ephemera, one that in less than two year’s time we’ll look back at and snicker that we ever bothered with it in the first place, like Am I Hot or Not? or Kissing Suzy Kolber. But for the time being, it’s a limitless wellspring of comedic possibilities. And so we present recent a snapshot taken from Terrell Owen’s feed, discovered in the Farkian badlands by the inimitable LSUFreek. No doubt Drew Rosenhaus’ feed is “Next question” over and over again. One-note jokes are good like that.

/awaiting iTwitter shirts