Biopics are a tricky subject. For every masterpiece like Raging Bull there is some steaming pile of crap like The Babe that is hampered by bad writing and casting. Some of the most intriguing films never even make it to filming because of factual uncertainties. Fortunately we don’t have to worry about these tricky aspects of film making, because our only task is to pick the subject. Everyone in human history is fair game, save for those who have been the subject of a biopic that was released in theaters.

Let’s get started.

1. Punte- 1. Kurt Cobain

The most influential musician of the last 20 years. The movie will be nothing but drugs, nudity and great music. And it’ll end just like the first half of Boogie Nights.

And if there is a god the woman playing Courtney Love will look nothing like Courtney Love.

Read the rest of this entry »

Memes are everywhere on the internet. Some, like our friend Beaker, are endearing and hilarious. Unfortunately a lot of them are grating and obnoxious. That’s why this week we’re drafting memes that we’d banish from the internet forever. Flubby gets us started after the jump.

Read the rest of this entry »

This week we’re drafting a specific room from the movie of your choosing. Any room that is picked would be magically added to your respective homes. You would have full use/ownership of every physical thing in said room, except for the people (owning people is not chill). Once a particular movie has been selected all other rooms from that movie (or franchise) are off the board. This one was Drew’s idea, so we’ll start with fairly obvious number one choice.

1. Drew – The Bat Cave

Drew didn’t specify a particular movie, so we’ll assume he’s going with the most up-to-date version.

Read the rest of this entry »

This week we drafted NFL announcers, analysts, and reports that we would banish from television forever. Draftees must be regular on-air talent for FOX, CBS, NBC, NFLN, or ESPN. Ufford leads us off, with the rest coming after the jump. Add your picks in the comments.

1. Caveman – Al Michaels

Read the rest of this entry »

There is a difference between a movie I’m willing to watch over and over again, and a movie that I think is great or something like that. Just because I think a movie is amazing doesn’t mean I want to see it a hundred times. I thought “There Will Be Blood” was one of the best movies I’ve ever seen. But I don’t think I ever want to see it again. Conversely, I could watch shit like “Blades of Glory” 500 times. And it’s not like I’m picking up new subtleties every time I watch it. It’s “Blades of Glory”. It’s mildly diverting. It just happens to be mildly diverting even if I’m watching it the thousandth time. I think it’s because of that chick in the leather tube top in Ferrell’s sex rehab group. She’s an animal.

Anyway, with that in mind, we dug down and did a draft that centered around this question: If you were only allowed to watch one movie over and over again the rest of your life, what would you pick? The proverbial desert island movies, although screw the island. You get to watch them at home, with a couch and beer and stuff.

The rules: Pick one movie. No picking of entire trilogies or something. And let us also assume you still have free access to all the porn you like, so only REAL movies. Three rounds. The order:

Flubby
Falco
Ape
Caveman
Punter
Maj
Drew

Off we go.

Read the rest of this entry »

St. Patrick’s Day is less than a week away. It remains, for many people, an invitation to get utterly shitfaced. But the day itself is not without its annoyances. Here’s what we would do if we had the power to make the best drinking weekday a little bit better for everyone.

The premise. You are the head of state in your own city or town, and you have the ability to pass and enforce ONE law that will be in effect for St. Patrick’s day ONLY.

The draft order. Matt. Jack. Josh. Mike. flub. Drew. Falco.

Off we go. Read the rest of this entry »

The great Friday offseason tradition at KSK rears its pus-filled head yet again on this fine site. For those of you new to the program, it’s much like any other mock draft in which you’ve taken part. We, the editors of the site, make our picks. Then you pick. You wait ten picks, and you pick again. It sounds easy, but about 30 of you will screw it up. Read the rest of this entry »

This week’s draft is a twist on an old classic. You’re drafting a singular super power from a fictional character, though not their entire catalog of abilities. Also, you must take on their appearance. Again, we’re lazy slugabeds who only got through one round, leaving commenters more opportunity to ignore the rules make picks.

Ufford’s explanationAll right, you get to have one power from a fictional character from comics, literature, TV, or the movies. Once a character has been used, s/he is off the board. (For example, if you want Wolverine’s retractable claws, no one can claim his healing powers.) Once a specific power shared by many characters has been drafted (i.e. flight or super strength), it’s off the board. And if you draft a power that is connected to appearance, you also get that appearance as well (see: The Thing, Incredible Hulk).

1. Ape
2. Maj
3. flub
4. drew
5. Punter
6. Uff

Read the rest of this entry »

For this week’s KSK mock draft, we started off by imagining we all lost our left hands in a tragic boating accident. GAHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOO!!! MY HAND! IT’S GONE! BLOOD! BLOOD EVERYWHERE! SINEW! DANGLING ARTERIES! I’LL NEVER PLAY OUTFIELD AGAIN!

Read the rest of this entry »

This is Jules Asner. Oooooooh, Jules. Jules used to host “Wild On!” on E!, before Brooke Burke took over the show, followed by Tara Reid running the show into the ground (TARADISE!).

Anyway, the show consisted of Jules looking awesome and partying in the hottest party towns across the globe: Ibiza, Rio, Miami, Akron, and such and such. That was it. That was her job, for which she was no doubt handsomely compensated. I’m not sure there’s a better job in the universe than getting paid to go and have a great time on some production company’s tab. And so, with Jules in mind, we commence this week’s dream job draft.

Read the rest of this entry »