Posts Tagged ‘Jerry Jones’

Cowboys Stadium Features Cage Dancers, Lacks End Zone Stripper Poles

Monday, September 21st, 2009

cage dancers
Come on Jerry, surely you can find these girls outfits befitting a cage dancer.

Much has been made of the many eye-opening features at the new Cowboys Stadium, and rightly so. I thought we’d already seen everything the stadium had to offer, and then we were treated to the cage dancers. That development got us wondering what other features Jerry Jones tried to cram into the stadium. After a little bit of digging we managed to come up with a list of proposed stadium features that didn’t make the cut for a variety of reasons.

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Dallas Is Compensating For Something

Friday, August 21st, 2009

dallas

Did you hear that Jerry Jones built a gargantuan $1.15 billion shrine to football and decadence? Because he did, and he wants everyone to know how GODDAMN HUGE it is. Needless to say, Dan Snyder will take this shirt as an affront to his stature and he’ll be even more eager to build a shiny new monstrosity of his own. [NBC DFW]

I Hate Every Ape I See, From Chimpan-A to Chimpanzee

Friday, August 14th, 2009

88158460JJ009_Dallas_Cowboy

Presented without comment: Jerry Jones interacts with fans at the Black Hole.

Thursday, January 15th, 2009

Could TO be done in Dallas? From ESPN: “Owner Jerry Jones has pointed to the negative impact that Owens’ release would have on the club’s salary cap as a major reason for keeping the receiver around. But it sounds like others at Valley Ranch, namely his son Stephen, are trying to convince Jones that releasing T.O. would be worth the financial risks.” YEEEEEEHAW!!!!!!! MY SON IS FUCKIN’ RATIONAL!