Screamy Taskmaster vs. Washed-Up Star and STD Repository. WHO YA GOT?
Friday, October 16th, 2009
The unbeaten Giants travel to the Superdome Sunday to play the undefeated Saints. It’s a supremely consequential game that could play a large part in the eventual make-up of the NFC playoff picture. But let’s not that allow all that meaningful subtext to get in the way of petty grudges one player holds against the team that made him a star. But it’s not just any former player – it’s a heroic douchebag that the more obnoxious members of the Giants fanbase still cling to as though he invented chin strap facial hair and chain smoking. Meanwhile, that player is promising to have his best game of the year against his former team. Since he’s already has two TDs in one game, he must be promising three. Will he deliver. WHO YA GOT?
Tom Coughlin______________________Jeremy Shockey
What’s his specialty?
SCREAMSCREAMSCREAMING_________________Bearing unique cocktails of STDs
What did he do to frighten Eli?
Use non-inside voice while inside__________________Get non-temporary tattoos
Has he passed out in Vegas?
CAN YOU PASS OUT FROM SCREAMING?! THEN YES!______________Blacked out anytime not on field
Can he get away with mixed race marriages in his state?
DON’T CARE! TOO BUSY SCREAMING!___________________Guess not
Does he remain a Giant or is he Jeremy Shockey?
Did Anyone Hear Him Screaming “Falcon, Falcon”?
One redeeming accomplishment
That Super Bowl he won___________________Screwing Vida Guerra
Finishing move
Being relevant_________________________Being lucky enough to have Drew Brees throwing to him
