In honor of our colleague Christmas Ape, who was released from his day job yesterday for outing himself here on this blog, we present a special Kill Kill Kill video that fully illustrates the Washington Post termination process.

As you can see, the Ivy League trained leopard isn’t content to just kill the poor primate. It must also drag him around in the dirt, in front of fellow Ivies, insulting his dignity in the process. I’m assuming the leopards then went on to play squash after this. Guardians of democracy, my left nut!