Mike Tomlin: Ben, glad to have you back at practice yesterday. Last time we played the Chargers, we outgained them almost two-to-one but only came away with nine points from the offense. Gotta improve on that.

Ben Roethlisberger: …

Mike Tomlin: Ben! You with me? I know you passed the memory test, but I’mma need you sharp out there. Can’t afford mental mistakes in the playoffs.

Ben!

BEN!

Roethlisberger: HEADSPOT FEELS GROGGY. TOO MUCH HEAD IN THE GROG

MUST…KEEP HEAD IN MULTIPLAYER GAME

Tomlin: Comrade! We must exterminate the scum that has laid waste to our homeland. Take your gun and strike them down!

Ben: AYE AYE COACH

Roethlisberger: HEINZ FIELD IN BETTER SHAPE THAN NORMAL. GOT MY PEW MACHINE READY. LET’S GREASE US SOME JAPS!

WAIT – I THOUGHT I WAS IN A RUSSIA STAGE! THIS WAR TAKING A TOLL ON THE BEN

WHAT’S IN THAT TREE!?

PEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEWPEW

OH, THERE’S A TREE IN THAT TREE.

AAAAAHHHHHH NO, HOW’D THE JAPS RECRUIT YOU HINES? DON’T WANNA GREASE THE HINES. HE’S THE ONE WHO KNOWS HOW TO SCORE ME THE CHOCO TACO

HIT R2 BUTTON!

R2R2R2R2R2R2R2R2R2R2R2

WHEW – BROKE HINES TACKLE. THAT WAS TOO CLOSE

WHY THE NATE DAWG IN MY SCOPE? DON’T WANNA PEW HIM EITHER. THIS WAR IS TURNING STEELER AGAINST STEELER. THIS IS THE WORST TRIP THE BEN EVER BEEN ON.

[Mike Scifres pooch punts grenade at him]

LINEMEN PLEASE FALL ON GRENADE FOR THE BEN

PLEASE

LINEMEN?

HALP!

BEN…

BEN NOT DEAD?

WHEN I SIGN UP FOR THE XBOX HEAD MEMBERSHIP?

IT KINDA COOL