Okay, journalism students, let’s try a quick exercise. 34 more NFL players have been placed on injured reserve through 10 weeks this season compared to the same period last year. This has happened in the context of the league and the players union being at a standoff over the idea to expand the regular season to 18 games. I want ledes and I want ‘em punchy. Bring the reader into the story.

FOXSports.com senior NFL writer Alex Marvez! I don’t know what you’re doing in a rudimentary journalism class, but let’s see what you’ve got.

Roger Goodell’s heart is in the right place.

Unfortunately, too many body parts of NFL players aren’t.

Whoa, watch it, folks! Word wizard comin’ through. He’s magically transported me to Elysian Fields of lush imagery where random appendages belonging to Leonard Weaver, DeMeco Ryans and Aaron Kampman are scattered about.

Notice how each sentence is its own self-contained paragraph, so as to draw extra attention to the virtuosic wordsmithery on display. That’s great hack hustle! I will say it’s a shame there are no NFL players with the last name McGreg. I’ll just have to settle for a horrible Kelly Gregg injury instead.

It’s been announced that St. Louis Rams quarterback Marc Bulger has finally passed his neuropsych evaluation thus allowing him to play this Sunday. The passed test comes just in time, seeing as how venerable (F’real!) backup Gus Frerotte has been ruled out of action. The only other quarterback on the roster is one Brock Berlin, whose career famously peaked at the age of 17.

Thanks to our reputation as idealistic upholders of journalistic integrity KSK was invited to observe Bulger’s most recent examination. So grab yourself a handful of Junior Mints and join us for this unprecedented insider’s look…

Dr. Spaceman: Alright Marc, we’re going to do this evaluation just like last week, only this time I’m sober-ish.

Dr. Spaceman: You’re good as new!

The Sports Network (which exists) is reporting that the NFL will open a “concussion hotline” for concerned players, doctors, coaches, and that guy that takes fantasy football a bit too seriously.

The NFL has taken a proactive stance on addressing concussions, a condition that has led to several players retiring or being sidelined for substantial amounts of time.

The league announced Tuesday that it would establish a concussion hotline. It’s being formed to report information on a confidential basis about players being forced to practice or play against medical advice.

KSK has recently learned that players confidential informants have come forward on behalf of these woozy injury victims.