Memes are everywhere on the internet. Some, like our friend Beaker, are endearing and hilarious. Unfortunately a lot of them are grating and obnoxious. That’s why this week we’re drafting memes that we’d banish from the internet forever. Flubby gets us started after the jump.

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This week we’re drafting a specific room from the movie of your choosing. Any room that is picked would be magically added to your respective homes. You would have full use/ownership of every physical thing in said room, except for the people (owning people is not chill). Once a particular movie has been selected all other rooms from that movie (or franchise) are off the board. This one was Drew’s idea, so we’ll start with fairly obvious number one choice.

1. Drew – The Bat Cave

Drew didn’t specify a particular movie, so we’ll assume he’s going with the most up-to-date version.

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This week we drafted NFL announcers, analysts, and reports that we would banish from television forever. Draftees must be regular on-air talent for FOX, CBS, NBC, NFLN, or ESPN. Ufford leads us off, with the rest coming after the jump. Add your picks in the comments.

1. Caveman – Al Michaels

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We’re sticking with the celebrity theme for this week’s draft, although this time around we’re picking our ideal neighbor. It’s important to consider the pluses and minuses of your celebrity neighbor. While you may think it would be cool to live next door to a guy like Woody Harrelson because you imagine he grows really good weed, you must remember that he’s also a vegan raw foodist. Do you really want somebody like that at your next cookout? Hell no. So check out our picks after the jump, then add yours in the comments.
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Don’t worry, this draft has nothing to do with that show. Instead we’re picking a celebrity under whom we’d like to apprentice for a period of one year. In order to keep things interesting we’ve eliminated any sex industry types from consideration. Everybody else is fair game, as long as they’re alive. Ape leads us off this week we with a pretty easy choice. Continue after the jump for the rest, then play along in the comment section.

1. Ape – Charlie Sheen

I suppose winning is a vital skill.

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We’re keeping things nice and simple this week by drafting subjects that are deserving of a dedicated television station. The only rule is that you can’t pick a subject that has already been given similar treatment. So if anyone was planning on drafting rotisserie chicken, you’re out of luck. Seriously.

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This week we were inspired by the geniuses at IBM who managed to create a computer capable of beating the crap out of our nation’s preeminent trivia dorks. While Watson was specifically designed to compete in this singular event, its (his?) future applications are far reaching. His next assignment will take him into the healthcare field, and after that it’s anyone’s guess. It was with that in mind that we crafted this week’s draft. The basic idea is that we’re picking an event for a robot/computer to compete or participate in, with an eye towards future applications. At least that’s the basic idea I had in my head when Ape suggested the topic. I have no damn clue what assumptions Drew was operating under.

The draft order is as follows.

Drew
Punte
Maj
Caveman
Ape
Flubby

Continue after the jump for the ROBODRAFT.
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Welcome to the first mock draft of the 2011 off-season. Once again we’ll be holding a weekly mock draft each Friday between now and the actual NFL draft during April’s final week. Now if you’re new to the site you should probably know that these mock drafts have absolutely nothing to do with football. Real mock drafts are worthless, so we do this to pass the time instead. Feeling left out? Worry not, you can play along in the comment section. Plus, during the time between the draft and the Hall of Fame Game we’ll be holding similar weekly drafts for the commenters.

We’ll start things off with a historically themed mock draft (see others here and here). Each of us will select historical figures we would want to follow on Twitter (ignoring things like language and technological barriers). The draft order is as follows.

Caveman
Punter
Ape
Maj
Drew
Flubby

Continue after the jump for the draft, then contribute your own picks in the comment section. Just remember to wait ten picks before selecting a second time, and feel free to include a sample tweet.

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With Labor Day weekend set to begin in, oh, let’s say two hours, I thought it would be fun to craft the perfect holiday. Each commenter will “draft” their own brand new federally recognized holiday. The holiday can honor anything, from your own birth, to a general appreciation of grills. In fact, I’m going to go ahead and declare August 5th, Grill Day (August 5th is also International Beer Day, how fortuitous). There’s grilling, beer, women dressed like vintage pin-up models, and for some reason, a giant pinata shaped like a Weber grill filled with thick-cut cured bacon. And even if you don’t like that stuff it’s still a day off in August, something our calendar sorely lacks.

Note: For this draft you’re allowed a maximum of two selections, not to be made within 20 picks of each other.

I liked Yogi the Bear when I was a kid. He ate other people’s food at will, he scored choice bear tail, he didn’t take any crap from the law, and he wore a tie without pants. So much win.

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