Kissing Suzy Kolber » fashion http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com KSK is a humor site dedicated solely to the NFL. Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:11:46 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Urlacher fined $100,000 for hat– Goodell drunk on power, scotch Gatorade http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/04/urlacher-fined-100000-for-hat-goodell.html http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/04/urlacher-fined-100000-for-hat-goodell.html#comments Thu, 19 Apr 2007 16:10:00 +0000 flubby http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/04/urlacher-fined-100000-for-hat-goodell-drunk-on-power-scotch-gatorade.html
From the desk of Roger Goodell, Commmissioner National Football Leagye

To: Brian Urlacher
Re: Courtesy reminder on official NFL player apparel policy

Do you know what ‘Official Sports Drink of the NFL’ means, Brian? It means if you show up at Media Day wearing a faggy hat pimping some bullshit fortified water, I am going to fine your ass six-figures. Capiche, dickhead?

I am through playing around you bastards. David Stern thinks he is some kind of a hardass??? I’ll show him a what a hardass really is. He wants to suspend a referee for the playoffs??? I’ll push a referee down a fucking elevator shaft if they so much as look at me sideways. No more vitaminwater hats, Brian. And if you cross me one more time, I swear on all that is holy, I will make your life a living hell, do you understand me you miserable prick? With me, you do not fuck.

But to make it up to you I want to introduce you to some newly approved official NFL apparel, just for you. Enjoy, cockmunch.

Yours truly,

Rog

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