There were three games this season that KSK live blogged that didn’t turn out to be complete disasters: the Saints-Packers opener, Bears-Eagles in early November and, finally and perhaps most spectacularly, the first meeting between the Giants and Cowboys that featured Tony Romo diving into his own end zone for a safety and ended with Jason Pierre-Paul blocking a potential game-tying Dallas field goal while Jerry Jones’ grandson looked on in delicious, delicious anguish. Should the second encounter, which will decide who “wins” the NFC East and hosts Atlanta next week, turn out anything like that, we can feel a tiny bit better about all those primetime games with Tyler Palko that we had to suffer through.

I am weak. My weakness is strong. I let my hopes get stoked that the Giants could come into the Marcedes-Benz Maybach Music Superdome and give the Saints a semblance of a game, but it ended up being only slightly less lop-sided than the 62-7 New Orleans blowout of the Fat Humps back in Week 7. Next Sunday, we’ll be forced to live blog the Suh-less Lions against the Saints on SNF just because the alternative is Chargers-Jaguars on Monday night. And Detroit is gonna lose by 40. Such is the live blog.

Gruden is very amused by people on crutches, btw, especially if they’re Sean Payton. In the waning minutes of the blowout, he had some poor production assistant bring him a pair to goof with in the booth. It’s not only visual puns that Gruden is after. He also clumsily described Payton as “up and at ‘em” right as the camera cut to Sean on crutches.

Then again, Payton does nothing to discourage this by using the crutches as a celebration prop. In the best of all worlds, we can impale Mike McCarthy on one in the NFC Championship Game.

Lest we forget – Eli had a sad. Many a silly orange ‘stached sad.

The video below was actually my favorite sequence of the night. First, we get a SPROLES NEEDS NO HOLES Seussian rhyme from Gruden. Then, after Gruden proceeds to call Tiny Darren the greatest free agent acquisition of the off-season, Jaws feels the need to smart up the room by suggesting the Texans’ signing of Jonathan Joseph, which draws five seconds of dead air before Tirico is basically forced to be, like, “NO, ASSHOLE”.

What’s this? A Monday night game between two teams well positioned in the playoff chase? How many times has that happened this season? Oh yeah – once. It was Week 5 with Detroit and Chicago [Okay, Philly-Chicago is arguably another and the game itself was superior to Bears-Lions, but the Eagles are hardly a playoff caliber team, so there]. Better enjoy tonight while it lasts because it’s Chargers-Jaguars keck vs. dreck next week. Though we may have to do a Superdome repeat and live blog the Sunday night game instead. We’ll see.

Speaking of the Superdome, I missed the news last month that Mercedes-Benz bought naming rights for the once decrepit death pit turned renovated non-death pit. Awww, you went and got fancy on us, Saints. ANOTHER STEP TOWARD BEING REVILED OVERDOGS!

WELP. At least one more week of analysts wondering aloud whether the Eagles can turn it around. This game also answers Ufford’s black Tebow Photoshop post. The answer is, of course, Vince Young. Hell, Vince Young was black Tebow even before Tebow came into the league.

Nevertheless, more Eagles hype might actually be worth it for this latest dose of Manningface. CAN’T SPELL FAILURE WITHOUT ELI.

Also, NBC has the worst brand loyalty of any network broadcasting the NFL. Costas makes a habit of holding his nose while announcing what’s going to be on “Today” the following morning as he’s signing off. And now Collinsworth muttered “no thanks” after a “Fear Factor” promo coming out of a commercial break. If NBC’s authority weren’t being flouted by such pompous assholes like Costas and Collinsworth, it would actually be refreshing.

The NFL on Sunday debuted its annual commercial to build hype for the playoffs. While admirable in concept – the ad features a quick montage of YouTube clips of Saints fans celebrating Tracy Porter’s decisive pick-six of Fetushead Von Alwayschokes in last year’s Super Bowl – the spot closes on the disquieting image of a small Saints fan (possibly a child) leaping gleefully into the thrusting hips of a Ignatius Reilly-esque behemoth ironically clad in a Reggie Bush jersey.

If wildly size diverse couples, same-sex or not, wish to gyrate suggestively in elation following a monumental play, that’s their business, but we’d prefer the image of which not being foisted on the masses during each commercial break, which means potentially twice per kickoff.

On that note, please have at your teeming stocking of Manningface (Elisha edition) following the jump.

And yes, we plan to live blog the games both Monday and Tuesday nights.

Looks like somebody is having a problem with DeSean jogging along the goal line at the end of his epic punt return. That never happens in squash. The taunting there all has to do with how many antiques you gather with mumsy.

Guilty conscience: “But shouldn’t you at least be thankful that you actually have a job, especially in these dire economic times. Why, there are those who would kill for what you have.”

Alcohol: “STFU.”

Anyway, your Meast for Week 11 is Bills wide receiver Steve Johnson, who scored three touchdowns in Buffalo’s comeback win over Cincinnati. I guess I’m thankful for the way he’s emerged from obscurity to help propel one of my fantasy teams to respectability this year. Greg Jennings put up numbers similar to Johnson’s in the Packers 31-3 reaming of the Vikes, but I’m going to give the edge to Johnson for taunting the dynamic duo of diptardery, Chad Ochocinco and Terrell Owens, after a touchdown.

Melty faced Raiders fan flubby insisted that we give the Meast to Richard Seymour for clocking Roethlisberger at the end of the first half of the Steelers’ curbstomping of Oakland on Sunday. The rest of us didn’t agree, but I’ll give him an honorable mention anyway.

Seymour, by the way, was fined for the totally non-James-Harrison-elevated amount of $25,000 (totally worth it, says flub) and received no suspension, which just further reinforces the perception that the Steelers get everything they want from the league and blah blah blah blow me.

Your Co-Leasts for Week 11 are Peyton and Eli Manning. Each destroyed their team’s comeback bid in spectacular Manning-esque fashion. Peyton brought the Colts within range of tying a game they had no business being in only to blow it by throwing a terrible interception in the red zone while Elisha stupidly executed a head-first slide when he well past the first down marker, only for the ground to force him to fumble before a defender contacted him. Looks like Eli gets nothing but punishment casserole on Thursday!

As was mentioned during the broadcast last night, Philip Rivers’ lil’ brudder recently committed to play QB for LSU. Once he makes it into the league, he and Marmalard can square off in a three-way tag team match with the Mannings and the Palmers. Or maybe get the Godwinn Brothers involved just to push it to a four-way.

Now I hope you didn’t fill up on Peytonmanningface because Aunt Hortense brought her specialty Elimanningface this year and you know how she gets if people don’t flock to her dish. Yeah, I know, I know. But just do this for me, won’t you? Just be a sport and have some Elimanningface. Is that really a huge imposition on you? Do me this one favor, won’t you? Look, it’s tasty. I’m having some. MMMMMMMM. See? Now have some. Open up. JUST OPEN YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH AND HAVE SOME. THERE ARE STARVING KIDS IN AFRICA WHO DON’T GET ANY MANNINGFACE. IF ONLY YOU KNEW HOW GOOD YOU HAD IT!

Either tWWL holds Eli is as high a regard as we do, or this is the cheapest ratings grab since the last time they let LeBron James ride their last lingering shred of respectability bareback for an hour live in a middle of a gymnasium.

Of course, wherever there is Giant Gash, Ben is sure to follow.