As it is happening more often, police officers at the Seattle/Green Bay game tonight are wearing Packers paraphernalia in an effort to deter Seahawks supporters from bullying visiting fans. Cops will also be eating 22 inch sausages wrapped in deep fried butter, in order to curb any suspicion.


- There’s also going to be a Chunky Soup statue of Richard Sherman at the game tonight. Let’s not forget what happened last time someone was endorsed by this mediocre soup. Mediocre.

- The run on domestic violence is getting disturbing, with reports surfacing now about Jets rookie wideout Quincy Enunwa pulling a woman by her ankle off a bed. Bob Costas is now updating his halftime soapbox speech with some last minute additions for tonight.


– Hue Jackson is running something called the “Bengal coast offense” now, which will finally help them defeat Joe Montana and those pesky 49ers.

- The New York Daily News is “sacking the name” of the Washington professional football franchise. Let’s applaud them for being so edgy, you guys.


- Big Ben got photobombed by a sea lion at the zoo. Hey, guys with grey penises have to stick together.