NFL.com, Tim Tebow staying in shape, hoping for another NFL chance.
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"Tim Tebow NO NO NO NO NO NO NO"
You know who needs a QB? The Vikings.
You shut your whore mouth!
…is what Mike Priefer said to a slightly effeminate-looking guy who was about to ask if he wanted a refill on his coffee.
*Jamarcus Russell looks up from his garbage bag full of Mexican food*
“So you’re saying there’s a chance?”
It’s a good thing my Tebowmania bunker from 2011 is still well provisioned.
Expecting a Tebowpocalypse, were we?
The threat of the Tebowcalypse will always be among us.
My bunker is ready to go at an instant. Plenty of booze to survive and brain bleach in case the Tebowtards reach my bunker
My cruise missiles are still targeted at Bristol.
@LoBF: good hustle restocking the bunker. No one ever expects to have to survive the apocalypse twice.
The bunker is a good place to store old Penthouses; cool and dry…… jussayin’
Hey, Tim Tebow was the top AFC write in for Least of the year in 2012!
Just for old times sake: http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2012/12/the-2012-least-bowl-roster.html
Don’t know where I was for that, but it looked like a good time.
Duplicate comment detected; it looks as though you’ve already said that!
Whuuuh? How the fuck can that be?”
I also like to believe Crosby’s voting to the Least Bowl finally got him to reactivate Crosby from 2007. So, thanks, Fek!
“Former Brocos, Jets and Florida Gators player…”
Let us make no mention of the helmet he’s wearing in our banner picture, for that never happened.
Brocos; douchey tacos.
I will never get tired of the nope satellite gif
First of all, no.
Second of all, there is some good things about Tim Tebow seriously trying, yet ultimately failing, at becoming an NFL quarterback again:
1.) He serves as a barometer of whose opinion I should completely dismiss. TIm Tebow is the football equivalent of Anti-vaxx and chemtrails all rolled up into one.
2.) Getting said dumb people’s hopes up as he gets a shot, all the while knowing it will end, and end badly. Preferably he’ll get a chance to start, just to avoid any stupid arguments about “not getting a fair chance” or ” the coach didn’t know how to use him.” But, again, the words coming out of those people’s mouths would still not matter even one iota.
And one for Sill:
Oh c’mon guys. What if he signed with the cowboys? It would be derplicious!
It would be the ultimate battle of Good vs. Evil, as the incorruptible Tebow was exposed to the moral depravity of the one known only as…Jerrah.
It would probably look something like this:
Betting on red:
I’m guessing an event of that magnitude (Tebow with the Cowboys) would have us finding out just how many KSKers could fit inside LotB’s Tebowmania bunker.
Pray to gob and jeebus that we never find out.
Well, we could pick the other side…
Two sides. Same coin:
True. Although that side gets better swimwear.
Depends on which side of the jeebargument you support:
Thet ain’t no Jebus! Jebus a white man wid blue eyes and blonde hair! ‘Murica!
Jeebus: Palestinian Socialist Orthodox Jew.
Live with it.
My personal favorite:
Can’t post Pharyngulations but my sympathies are depthless.
That all was supposed to be a reply to the Komment below:
I can’t. It hurts too much.
Standard GOP boilerplate:
This Godzilla destruction reminds me of how annoyed I get when I see movies that cut a suspension bridge in the middle and keep thinking the bridge deck will magically float in the midair with a gap in it.
OMFG the bridge thing makes me crazy! The latest Planet of the Ape shitfest has that very image on the POSTER!!!
Courtesy of great kommenter Darkest Timeline Zach Morris I just watched ‘The Room’ and I would wager that it will win the Oscar for Best Picture before Tebow starts in the NFL again.
“I’d like to tank the acaduaufgdouw duogdouvd wdbouwd.”
i wouldn’t wager too much, brian hoyer, thad lewis, case keenum, kellen clemens, ryan fitzpatrick, chad henne, kyle orton, matt flynn, josh freeman, the tall guy from nc state and the guy in between rodgers and flynn all started games last year. Then again rumor is James Franco wants to remake The Room, so who knows.
So, the local theater that does showings of The Room is having their 5th Anniversary of starting their monthly showings on August 15th. They even put on the schedule “WHO KNOWS WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN AT THE NEXT SCREENING OF “THE ROOM”??” so I obviously HAVE to go.
See also: https://www.flickr.com/photos/94605439@N02/13789432574/in/set-72157644072909378/lightbox/
I say we take off and nuke the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.
I’m seeing Sarah’s “no no no” reaction as something akin to the final moments of “Mizumono” from Hannibal. The mood certainly fits.
…and then Alana went out the window.
DAMNITALL I WANT TO KNOW WHO SURVIVED!
Hannibal makes it, so that’s good right? Right? ….right?
Fuck off and die.
Everyone in America Who Isn’t a Blathering, Cement Headed Born Again Christian
On the plus side, I am very cheered by the sheer number of “Nope” themed pictures on Internet!
How did we miss this?
I have no clever gif, but seeing Louis CK upthread reminds me up his nugget of wisdom:
“Nobody fucks down”
Shouldn’t Tebow be harvesting foreskins somewhere instead of doing isometrics in anticipation of the impossible?
I’d rather see Favre come back.
I enjoy Favre come backs so much I’d rather nibble on the barrel of a loaded shotgun.
You know what I am for this… I stopped watching ESPN years ago because they crawl up certain players butt like some kind of Amazonian parasite, but screw it, give the world more Tebow schadenfreude. Lets all rejoice in the 20 mins Tebow coverage every hour where every throw and snap is dissected by Jaws (who is taking the term “Orange is the New Black” to a whole new level).
If Tebow returns and with Lebron back in Cleveland… ohh the wonderful adventures JFF will get into now he thinks no one will watch him. He will out Gronk Gronk and his rented penthouse in Cleveland (because honestly why buy?) will be nicknamed the Sex Boat. The domino effect will be, and I am not using this word lightly, EPIC!
Knowing the Browns, its only a matter of time before this happens.
He was a helluva punt protector.
SET DEFENSE CONDITIONS TO DEFCON 2! DEPLOY NICK SABAN!
SET DEFENSE CONDITIONS TO BASE COVER 2.
Good work, it’ll take him hours to figure that out, and years before he can complete half his passes against it.
Touch of the bubbly?
We can distract him! Send in the uncircumcised children!
WUT ABOUT THE SEC NETWORK! SEC! SEC! SEC!
The kid deserves his chance to fail (and fail and fail). We deserve our chance not to care. It would be sadly ironic if his QB skills would improve if he got laid.
The absolute worst thing about Tebow is knowing that the main argument in favor of his being allowed to run an NFL team is his playoff victory over my Stillers. Fucking Demaryius Thomas, man…
There’s always this counterargument
Wow, I forgot how fucking terrible he was at QB
Seriously, his release takes about a year to make. It’s worse than most HS QBs.
@packman_jon Checking out your links led me to this: http://www.nfl.com/gamecenter/2011122400/2011/REG16/broncos@bills#tab=videos&menu=gameinfo|contentId%3A09000d5d82560ce1
Yep, that’s Tebow throwing FOUR picks to the Bills.
I thought he was going to be on THE SEC NETWORK. You know the network that no one at ESPN is talking about. The network where failed SEC QB’s like Jesse Palmer, Greg McElroy and eventually Ryan Mallet will end up on. The network that will simulcast The Paul Finebaum show every day because we all know that the SEC doesn’t get enough coverage. Seriously if this happens I may have to take out Bristol. Get the kickstarter campaign going. BAIL OUT CBQUE. He died for our sins.
So great that The Dunge doesn’t want Michael Sam on his team because he would be “a distraction”, yet would welcome Tebow into his team. He’s horrible.
Well, we know what Football Coat says.
What the hell? It’s supposed to have the text:
All; PLEASE BOOKMARK THIS PAGE SO YOU CAN HAVE EASY REFERENCE TO NO GIFS!
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