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*FART SOUND*

First name: Greg

Last name: Robinson

The same Greg Robinson who was in my Hebrew School carpool?: Probably not.

Height: 6’5″

Weight: 332 lbs

Position: Left tackle

College: War damn eagle

High school: Thibodaux (Louisiana, obviously)

Wait, why didn’t he go to LSU? The finger thing.

Other famous alumni: Eric Andolsek

Year: Redshirt Sophomore

Why Nolan Nawrocki insists he’s leaving school so early: Pore

Why is actually leaving school so early? Because he’s a lock for the top ten, and his brain is functional.

Age: 21

Parents: Mother is Rhonda Robinson, father is the late Greg Blackledge.

Major: Public Administration

What does that mean? That “DMV employee” is a dream job in Alabama.

40 yard dash: 4.92

Twitter: @GRob_92

What his Twitter bio tells us: Punctuation is going to be used sparingly, if at all.

What his tweets tell us: He holds his alarm clock in the highest esteem.


Terrible song that accompanies his YouTube highlight video: I think it’s the audio version of a stock photo.

Potential Berman nicknames: Not Jackie, hopefully.

Unrelated shit that shows up in his Google Image Search: Rich Rod’s wife and her crazy hair.

Nicest comparisons: Larry Allen

More accurate comparison: Larry Allen, just not quite as good.

Strengths: Blocking

Weaknesses: Playing a skill position, probably.

Which makes him: An offensive lineman.

Red flags: Two of his brothers are incarcerated. (only applicable if you are Nolan Nawrocki)

Coveted by: Teams that don’t care about being criticized by Darren Rovell for passing up on a more marketable commodity.

Where he’ll go: Somebody boring like St. Louis.

What Nolan Nawrocki is saying: More of a run blocker than a pass blocker at this point. Also, BROTHERS IN PRISON.

Impact: Day one starter at left tackle for one of the league’s shittier teams.