Johnny-Manziel-Halloween

Last week, we found out that Teddy Bridgewater and Johnny Manziel had both visited with the New England Patriots. This was a bit of a surprise considering that the Patriots draft pick is way too low to have a realistic shot at either of these guys, and because they would seem to be pretty set in the quarterback department, at least for a few more years. Are the Patriots trading into the upper-reaches of the first round to draft Brady’s successor? Only time will tell, but one thing seems clear: Johnny Football in a New England Patriots jersey would be pretty awesome for everyone. Let’s break it down and see how this would be the best thing for all parties involved:

It would be great for Patriot fans

Let’s be very clear about something: every Patriots fan is scared shitless of Life Without Brady. I know this because I’m a Patriots fan, and while I try to appear like as much of a cocky bastard as possible, when I go to bed at night, there are many times when my last thought as I turn out the lights is “Man, when 2017 rolls around, we’re fucked.” Obviously, there’s no guarantee that Manziel will keep the Patriots from turning to shit once Brady is gone – he is the most polarizing QB prospect in the draft – but that won’t matter right away. We still get 2-3 more years of Brady to enjoy, and during that time, we can cheerfully tell ourselves Manziel is the long-term answer without having to find out if our theoretical savior is actually any good.

It would be really great for Johnny Manziel

Let’s face it: if Johnny Manziel goes to any of the struggling teams we think might take him, he’s going to be under a ton of pressure pretty much immediately. If he goes to the Jaguars, he instantaneously becomes the only thing in Jacksonville that anyone outside of Jacksonville cares about, and quite possibly the only thing that people in Jacksonville care about, too. If he goes to Cleveland or Minnesota, he’s entering a haven of pessimism that will turn on him the first time he throws a pick. If he goes to the Pats, not only is he going to a city with enough star athletes that he won’t immediately become the center of attention, he won’t even have to play right away! He can ride on the credibility of his two college seasons, while gradually improving his game behind the scenes without a ton of focus on him. As long as he can look semi-decent in his preseason playing time, he would have nothing to worry about.

It would be great for people who hate the Patriots.

If you’re the type of person who absolutely loathes everything related to the professional football franchise located in Foxboro, Johnny Football going to the Pats would be a dream for you! Is there a more fun athlete to hate? Sure, he’s a fun guy to watch, but his jerkass tendencies are through the roof right now, and if Manziel goes to the Pats, he would be the ultimate new villain for Pats haters who won’t have Brady and Belichick to kick around forever.

Johnny Football
Come on Bills fan, you KNOW you’d love to viciously boo this guy once a year.

So, while it’s too soon to know how likely the Pats trading up for Johnny Football is, it would be wonderful if they ultimately decide to pull the trigger. Clearly this is he team he was born to play for, and it would be highly beneficial for everyone concerned.