Bill Belichick

In honor of our mighty Grumblelord’s birthday, a poem:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I’m wearing this sweatshirt just for you.

Also honoring Coach Bill Belichick’s birthday, the Patriots pro shop which is offering free hoodie pins with the purchase of — you guessed it — a hoodie. As someone with a long interest in sports merchandising, I have to wonder why the team has never taken birthday boy’s discarded sleeves and turned them into pins, purses, hats and framable art pieces. Just think of all the wasted sweatshirt material that could be made into little Patriots tchotchkes and the fans dying to buy said tchotchkes. Or sell them on eBay for a charity drive to help a pet cause of some sort to help soften the hard, mean Grumblelord image.

Because it’s time to start thinking about your legacy, Coach. You’re not getting any younger and the team isn’t about to get any more winning-er. Retirement is sooner than you think.

[H/T Eye on Football]