Raiders

There are few things more feckless and pointless than online petitions, but that doesn’t mean they can’t also be funny. With that in mind, a few thousand people have expressed their desire to bring an NFL team to Oregon, preferably the Raiders.

And while the petition doesn’t specify which team should move there, the NFL to Portland website makes it clear that the folks behind it believe that the Raiders make a lot of sense. And why not? Raiders owner Mark Davis continues to raise the threat of relocation if Oakland doesn’t pony up a new stadium for its team.

The Portland backers offer some solid points as to why their city could be the future home of the Raiders:

22nd largest TV market in the country! (ignore that Oakland belongs in the sixth largest)
– Experience having a pro sports team located there!
– Not Oakland!
Can put a bird on the stadium!

Ultimately, the idea of Raiders fans mingling with crunchy Portland types is enough to convince me that it’s a good idea, financials be damned. After all, this is the will of the people. This petition is supported by the impossible to ignore title wave of public opinion that is slightly more than 2,000 people. I’m no census taker, but that sounds like half the country to me.

And judging by the message they plan to send to the governor of Oregon, THEY MEAN BUSINESS!

To:
John Kitzhaber, Governor of Oregon

We would like you to actively explore bringing an NFL team to Oregon.

Sincerely,
[Your name]

Well, that’s the just about the least forceful demand you can make. “Hey there, governor. Please, like, ask around about bringing the NFL here. We dunno. Uh, make some calls? Talk to the Chamber of Commerce? You know how these business things work, right? Anyway, do all that, but do it actively, which I guess means we’d prefer you wear a Nike Fuel Band while doing it. Thanks!”

So anyway, we should just go ahead and pencil in the Raiders to Portland any day now.

[via]