marshuni

As you might have heard, Marshawn Lynch “only” spent a little more than six minutes subjecting himself to inane questions, which may or may not have involved his preference of stripper, during Super Bowl Media Day before slinking away to the periphery of the media feeding den. This is a thing because some asshole reporter a few weeks ago ratted out Lynch for not being accommodating as possible with reporters over the course of the regular season. So whether or not Lynch participated fully in Media Day was already a story going in. There was speculation that Marshawn could be fined as much as $100,000 if he didn’t take part. Because that’s a thing reporters can do. Tattle to the league because a player isn’t giving them their requisite sound byte to distort.

After yesterday, the Pro Football Writers of America found enough time to collectively stop complaining about the lack of an expensed trip to a warm-weather climate city for the Super Bowl to issue a bitchy official statement decrying Lynch’s behavior during Media Day.

The Pro Football Writers of America, the official voice of pro football writers fighting and promoting for access to NFL personnel to best serve the public, is extremely disappointed in the lack of meaningful access to Seattle running back Marshawn Lynch at the Super Bowl XLVIII media day on Tuesday.

Several of our long-standing and high profile members were appalled by Mr. Lynch’s conduct and refusal to answer any questions. We find the statement that by the league that ‘Players are required to participate and he participated’ to be an affront to our membership. However, we are encouraged that the league will continue to closely monitor this situation.

HEAVENS! Were some of your high-profile dispensers of hot takes robbed of their chance to ask Marshawn Lynch his favorite flavor of Skittles? Surely this is an affront to the Fourth Estate. Let’s not kick and scream about a lack of access at owners meetings but piss our pants if one superstar player has limited access at an event notorious even in the writer community for being a huge clusterfucking waste of time.

What’s that? Oh, did Tony Dungy smugly remind everyone that when his team went to the Super Bowl, possible murderer Marvin Harrison was made available for the full hour at Media Day? Well great for him. Harrison’s tolerance for pointless bullshit is admirably high. Surely why he’s one of the greats.

This is why everyone hates the media. This is why, even as a member of the media, I hate the media. Lynch still has two more media availability sessions left this week. You’ll get your chance to lob narrative at him. And even if you don’t, the world will be no less for it.