Cetificate Of Merit Jan 29

Despite what Hobo Spices claimed in the Chicken Fried Bacon post, I am not trying to cull the Kommentariat one heart attack at time. Each Kommenter should be commending for getting through this horrible week without football, especially the Kommenters who braved watching the Pro Bowl along with us. Now? Only four more days until the last game of the season. Make every comment count.

I am your host Sarah Sprague, and these are your Comments of the Week for the Second to Last Week of the 2013-2014 NFL season.

Cydnee Leigh 12th Mann Is A Seahawks-Related Parenting Crime

Jo3l

“Ain’t that a bitch.”

- Macklemore Fish Market Hipster Grunge Match Henderson

KSK Celebrity Super Bowl Pickkake: Jennifer Lawrence

PeteRoseHair

Assassin’s Creed: Seahawks by 10 after Pete Carroll pirates all of Peyton’s commercials and Papa John repossess the magical strength he imbued Manning with.

I know this isn’t the video game thread, but making bad jokes and sputtering about crap she won’t care about is what I do when I meet a pretty girl in real life, so it seemed apropos here.

(via Getty Image)

(via Getty Image)


Meast and Least: Pro Bowl Weekend

Derpeche Mode

TORO LIKES BLUE BUTTS AND HE CANNOT LIE!

(Reply)crispyaod

YOU OTHER CATTLE CAN’T DENY
WHEN A HEIFER WALKS IN WITH AN ITTY BITTY WAIST
AND A ROUND THING IN YOUR FACE YOU-CHEW-CUD!

2014 Pro Bowl Live Blog (Because It’s Still Football) Plus T-Sizzle At The Club

Mendenhalls Truthers

Colts fans are always so spoiled by their QB’s pro bowl performances.

Mike McCarthyism

I assume before Ron Rivera was able to coach this game, Jerry Richardson asked if he had to pay him

tedbrandy

Revis is only in Hawaii in order to remember what an island looks like.

According To A Professional Eater, You’re Eating Chicken Wings The Wrong Way

Otto Man

Note to self: Develop chicken-wing-flavored breakfast cereal.

We’ll call them Buffal-Os.

Roger Goodell would consider allowing players to treat concussions with marijuana

Billz n the Hoody

Oh my God oh my god – what sound does it make when a bell gets rung? BONG. It goes bong, man! I just realized that thanks to this strong toek.

The Browns Are Finally Close To Getting A Head Coach And It’s Shockingly Not A Terrible One

Picketts Charge

It’s going to be all the more embarrassing now when it turns out the Browns have simply botched an attempt to order some french fries with gravy and cheese curds.

KSK Celebrity Super Bowl Pickakke: Shia LeBeou

Old School Zero

THIS GUY SHIA LEBEOUF I CALL SAM ROCKWELL IN MOON BECAUSE HE’S CERTAINLY NOT THE FIRST ONE TO BE UNORIGINAL AND WON’T BE THE LAST.

HERM: WE NEVER SHOULD HAVE CLONED CHAD PENNINGTON.

The Browns Are Reportedly Interested In Becoming Schiano Men

Hobo Spices

No more breaks at The Factory of Sadness! And only sissies cry after getting stuck in the lathe!

Annual “Fan Fired For Wearing Opposing Team’s Jersey” Story Has Arrived

CBQUE

Okay he’s douche not only for not going back to work, but also having not one but TWO John Lynch jerseys.

make it snow

I don’t really like the idea of someone being fired for wearing an opposing team’s jersey, but I do think anyone who shows up in a Von Miller jersey should be subject to an immediate drug test. You’d be crazy not to.