Who doesn’t love team-specific rap songs? They’re the number one way to say “I love rap music AND the NFL ” besides getting a neck tattoo or eating a fast-food breakfast. Just make sure that if you make a music video to go along with it, you label it “official” so everyone knows that it’s the real deal, especially when that song is based entirely on your team’s record after nine games. I mean who can forget M.C. Daniels’ Denver-Dougie, or “Money Aint A Thang” By Thunder Dan and JZ Zorn?
But if you’re going to make a rap video, please get your facts straight. I had to sit down and point out more statistical discrepancies than I would have cared for in a two-minute song.
Number 22 McCluster takin it back to the end zone
*Fact-Check: Pants on Fire. Dexter McCluster has never had a defensive touchdown.
Like shit was rough now in a new direction/We gon tote the defense with most interceptions
*Fact-Check: Close. The Chiefs are tied for 5th place in the league with 12 interceptions
Andy Reid- I like his appearance
*Fact-Check: Pants on Fire. I know this is technically an opinion but unless this line was spoken by a casting producer for “The Biggest Loser”, or an actress playing a wife in any commercial there’s no way this is true.
Number 82 puttin on a show/He a beast on the field- Dwayne Bowe
*Fact-Check: Dwayne Bowe has 369 yards this season and 2 TDs. Anytime you’ve had more grams of marijuana confiscated from you than first downs I’m going to call BS. Unless “Beast” is a form of sinsemilla that Bowe is harvesting on the Arrowhead turf, this claim falls flat.
Heart beatin like the drums in the band
All we need is two yards to advance.
Listen up listen up for the chant
Kansas City Chiefs got the number one fans
*Fact-Check- Total lie for claiming that any of these words rhyme.
I want more like this!
Follow Kissing Suzy Kolber on Facebook and get the latest NFL news and humor before everyone else.