weird ass survey question
Don’t bother trying to read it again, you’ll just give yourself a headache.

The Washington Redskins have undergone a lot of change since Mike Shanahan’s arrival. The team has gotten younger, deeper and more athletic. On the other hand, Dan Snyder is still the owner, so everything else is still kind of f*cked.

Their glad-handing “general manager” has absolutely zero say in player personnel decisions. Snyder himself has gone from micromanaging personnel to micromanaging everything else in the front office while the team’s hamfisted PR department tries to keep him in check. It’s like hiring a 14 year old to babysit for a 12 year old. Also, you left the liquor cabinet open and there are bottle rockets EVERYWHERE.

For instance, the Redskins have spent the entire offseason in an embarrassingly amateurish PR campaign designed to protect their team’s nickname. They have also had details of their goofy focus group leaked, and now a related online survey is making the rounds, via the beautiful and talented folks at the Bog.

Some of the questions are hilarious because they appear to be written by Bruce Allen while locked in a poorly ventilated closet filled with paint thinner (see above). Others are hilarious for their transparent effort to cast aspersions on their most hated rival (see below).

damn you wapo monsters

So what would it be like if every team in the NFL were run like the Redskins? Take a look at some sample questions after the jump, then add yours in the comments.

Does having an alleged criminal for an owner give the Browns…

• A COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE
• CRAZY STREET CRED
• SOMETHING TO IMPROVE UPON

How would you evaluate the game day experience at Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum?

• IT IS THE BEST IN THE LEAGUE
• IT IS ABOVE AVERAGE
• I HAVEN’T BEEN STABBED IN YEARS

What is your opinion of the Broncos’ Personnel Department?

• BOYS WILL BE BOYS
• NOBODY DIED, RIGHT?
• I SURE DO LOVE PEYTON MANNING