Aaron Hernandez’s day so far: being cuffed by cops while shirtless then losing his job. The Patriots have released Hernandez, which is either a sign that the charges against him are serious or that Aaron Hernandez has diabetes. Either way, Belichick won’t stand for it.

– Oh yeah, it’s not just Aaron Hernandez getting in trouble with the law. Browns rookie linebacker Ausar Walcott has been charged with first-degree attempted murder and second-degree aggravated assault for punching a man in the head outside of a club.

– Well, that’s enough bad news. Anthony Davis gave away a four-month-old bulldog puppy on Twitter. Don’t worry, he asked that the dog’s new owner not be mean to it.

– Okay, back to the bad news: Ravens running back Bernard Pierce was carjacked at gunpoint in Philadelphia. I tried to make a joke likening car security to ball security, but it’s probably for the best to admit defeat and move on.

– Maurice Jones-Drew won’t be charged in the bar altercation that took place last month, but he is being sued by the bouncer he allegedly punched. This day is crime blotter-y, you guys.

– Chip Kelly hit with a one-year show-cause penalty by the NCAA. Haha, that’s cute. I’m sure that will really dog the Eagles this season.

– Brett Favre, once addicted to painkillers, is now endorsing a line of pain meds. BUT IS IT YOLO BRAND!?