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Sexy Friday Invites You To The First Bikini Beach Party Of The Summer

By Burnsy / 05.17.13
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As much as I respect my UPROXXian colleague Danger Guerrero, his opinions on the ocean are what my Jewish grandmother Sylvia would have called, “Bupkis” if she actually existed. Sure, I hate things like sharks and octopi and whales and jellyfish and krakens, but if it weren’t for the oceans, we wouldn’t have beaches, and without beaches we wouldn’t have bikinis, and without bikinis we wouldn’t have bouncing and jiggling. I think my counterpoint wins.

Now that the summer is here, the ocean indeed serves a purpose, and I want to celebrate that purpose with this Sexy Friday tribute to bikinis and related swimwear. More than anything, I want to pay tribute to the women who wear them, because they’re the real heroes. And if Tim Brando has a problem with me calling Kate Upton a hero, then he can deal with me like a man.

(All GIFs and images via)

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