Russian dashcams: good at capturing comet strikes but also effective as getting footage of a driver weaving recklessly through traffic before eventually scraping the hell out of a bunch of other cars. Since the NFL is trying to get advanced about having cameras in the locker room, let’s get all the players dashcams as well. If they’re not going to use the free driving services, fans should at least get to watch DUIs unfold.

– The draft is officially moving to the middle of May, so expect 30 more weeks of Peter King having to spend an extra three on baseless draft speculation and smokescreens.

– Former Redskins linebacker Ken Harvey set up a Kickstarter fund to raise money for a comic book about a zero gravity sport he co-created called Floatball. He should just reach out to Philip Rivers because it’s the sport Marmalard needs to become a reality now.

– According to one report, there was contact without pads at the Buccaneers’ OTAs, a strict no-no according to current NFL labor rules. The league has no comment because they no how important it is for Greg Schiano to teach diving at the knees of the opposition.

Fox 2 News Headlines

– Matt Stafford visited an elementary school last week and was convinced to do the Dougie. Not that the Dougie wasn’t already dead, but having to see Matt Stafford perform it should ensure none of those youngsters ever tries to revive it.

– RGIII was answering the phones at Redskins Park yesterday. “No, for the last time, the team will not give you $70 million guaranteed unless you’re 36 and Dan Snyder has heard of you.”

– The Kansas City Royals manager nearly got arrested for wandering into a Chiefs minicamp, but was released once it was determined he had no designs on Andy Reid’s silo of pulled pork.