Apparently Ape’s wasn’t the only one off on a grand adventure this weekend, Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton spent his 24th birthday riding a Segway and dishing out high-fives along the beach in San Diego. And while it’s fun to watch a lady completely ignore the oncoming hand-slap, it’s even funnier to think about how this video was posted by quarterback consultant George Whitfield, Jr. One would think Whitfield would keep one of his prized clients off of a machine that killed its inventor and sent former President George W. Bush flying, because it’s not like Whitfield’s other students haven’t been seriously hurt by death machines.

Oops.

Well, at least Whitfield is teaching quarterbacks to wear helmets now.

(H/T @SmokeyCloud)