Via

Name: Tavon Austin

Age: 22

Height: 5’8″

Weight: 174 lbs

Position: Wide receiver, kick returner and occasional running back

Rivals.com position: “Athlete”

College: West Virginia

Awesome fellow Mountaineers: Steve Slaton, Don Knotts and Billy Mays

High school: Dunbar (Baltimore)

Awesome fellow Poets: Mugsy Bogues, Tupac Shakur and Prop Joe

Reported Wonderlic score*: Touchdown + point after

*which I don’t really care about, but here are everyone’s scores because pageviews.

Which makes him: KING OF WEST VIRGINNY

Year: Senior

Major: Athletic coaching education

That’s a major?: It’s West Virginia

Didn’t you take basketball coaching at Pitt? Yeah, but I didn’t major in it.

Probably because you dropped out: THIS ISN’T ABOUT ME.

Noteworthy combine results: 4.34 40 yard dash, 4.01 20 yard shuttle

Twitter: @Tayaustin01

What his tweets tell us: He would make a great travel writer.


Appropriate song that accompanies his YouTube highlight video: “Get Right” by Young Jeezy

Bermanesque Nickname: South By South West Virginia

Nicest comparison: A less dickish DeSean Jackson
Self-comparison: Reggie Bush
Meanest comparison: Titus Young, in response to that tweet about the Reggie Bush comparison.
Second round pick comparison: Randall Cobb

Strengths: Sick nasty open-field speed
Weaknesses: Lil’

Loved by: Bob Stoops, who called his performance against Oklahoma one of the best he’s ever seen
Hated by: Would-be tacklers

What scouts are saying:

Where he’ll go: OK, enough of this shit. Nobody knows where ANYBODY is going. If somebody tells you that they know where anyone is going you should spit in their face. But don’t count out the Jets!

Impact: Shitty offense becomes feared offense.

Word cloud magic via Wordle.net