Via @samanthasteeleespn

– Vikings quarterback Christian Ponder proposed to his girlfriend and ESPN College Game Day host Samantha Steele by spelling out “Marry Me” in Christmas lights. When asked by a local Minnesota gossip columnist if their engagement had been “a biblically chaste courtship,” Ponder responded “Uh, no, it’s not.” What the heck Minnesotans, I thought you weren’t so forward about asking about private matters. (Note: Everything I know about Minnesotans comes from Garrison Keillor.)

– Jets backup quarterback Tim Tebow called an Albany teenager who was injured in a car accident that killed two of the boy’s friends after #TebowCallMatt trended on Twitter. Look for my campaign #MilesAustinPleaseBringMeAPizza this upcoming weekend.

– Moralizer-in-training Mike Florio declared that players who encourage fans to drink should be “super duper fined” in an article about Vikings linebacker Chad Greenway requesting fans drink liquor and not beer so they’ll be “super duper drunk” for the game against the rival Bears. Florio went on to say,

Binge drinking remains a serious problem in our society, and the NFL continues to struggle with striking the balance between selling beer to fans while also ensuring that those fans don’t become sufficiently intoxicated to ruin another fan’s experience at the game or an innocent stranger’s life while driving home. Public comments from players urging fans to get sloppy drunk become irresponsible in this context, especially since plenty of fans are young and male and more than happy to oblige the home team’s request for folks to be “super duper drunk.”

Sure, but is this about corporate responsibility or because Bud Light has a $1.6 billion deal with the NFL and we all know that Bud Light is as far from hard liquor as you can get.

– Bengals defensive back Pacman Jones says he’s going into this weekend’s game against the Cowboys with a “double chip” on his shoulder. Apparently Jones still feels burned by his former team owner Jerry Jones and feels the reason he played so poorly in Dallas was because the Cowboys had a horrible coaching staff, which at the time would have included Wade Phillips and Dave Campo. Let’s check in on the always cheerful @sonofbum Twitter account to see how Phillips is taking this criticism.

Happy birthday to all who have a birthday today-not my wife because it is not hers. Untweet my incorrect tweet -thx

— Wade Phillips (@sonofbum) November 27, 2012

Yep, completely broken up about it.

– And finally, New York City madam Anna Gristina has hinted she will name high-level NFL executives – possibly associated with the Giants — and former players as clients in her upcoming Dr. Phil appearance. (I’m assuming this revelations has already made the Minnesota gossip columnist from the first item pass out from shock.) Gristina is quoted as saying, “Then there’s an older [football] player who’s still very well known” as being part of her reveal. Older player? No wonder Brandon Marshall said there is a Viagra problem in the NFL.