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Alternate title: Ogre versus Troll.

Were it any other city than Boston, I would assume this Boston Herald cover to be just an unfortunate play on words, but it’s Massholes so of course they want to imply that Andrew Luck’s standout rookie season has merely been the result of pure happenstance. Because no one expected him to be any good. NO ONE DENIES THIS!

Pointing out that the 199th pick in the draft even got the opportunity to be a regular starter in the league is owed more to chance than Luck’s ascent is more reasoning than an obvious troll attempt deserves, but there you go. Anyway, another drawback to Luck living up to his billing is that it means the media can continue to pump the Colts-Patriots rivalry like people actually give a sh*t. Jim Nantz will speak of it in hushed tones usually reserved for The Masters and other stuff white people love.

That said, both these defenses are horrible, so at least there should be 800 points scored.

Your early game slate, as rated for potential watchability by KSK’s patented four- and sometimes five-star system:

New Orleans at Oakland **
San Diego at Denver ***
Indianapolis at New England ***