Jon: WELCOME TO GRUDEN TALK THE TALK SHOW THAT DISCUSSES THE ISSUES OF THE DAY.  AS YOU KNOW, WE GOT AN ELECTION TODAY, ISN’T THAT RIGHT BANDLEADER HERM EDWARDS?

Herm: ELECTION DAY. YOU VOTE, AND THEY COUNT THE VOTES. WHOEVER HAD THE MOST VOTES WINS.

Jon: RIGHT YOU ARE, FRIEND. NOW AS YOU KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF POLLS OUT THERE. GALLUP. PPP. THE COACHES POLL. I’M PRETTY SURE RANDY RASMUSSEN HAS ONE TOO. OUR NEXT GUEST HELPS EVERYONE MAKE SENSE OF THE POLLS. SAY HI TO NATE SILVER.

Nate: Pleasure to be here, Jon.

JON: NATE SILVER. YOU’RE PURE GOLD IN MY BOOK. YOU’RE MORE ACCURATE THAN RICH GANNON. I BET YOU COULD RUN A RED RIGHT 24 WHAM 70 STICK PLAY NO PROBLEM. THIS NATE, I CALL HIM KELLEN MOORE BECAUSE HE’S A RUNT BUT HE KNOWS HOW TO THREAD THE NEEDLE.

Nate: Thank you, I think.

HERM: YOU THREAD THE NEEDLE, YOU WIN THE GAME. NATE SILVER, YOU CAN WIN THE GAME.

Nate: Well I like to think that I can prove through statistical analysis that the outcome of the election isn’t really in doubt.

Jon: YOU ALWAYS GOTTA INNOVATE. AL DAVIS. DON CORYELL. BILL WALSH. THIS BILL, I CALLED HIM PACIFICO BECAUSE HE WAS ALL ABOUT THE WEST COAST OFFENSE. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE WEST COAST, NATE?

Nate: There has been no polling that suggests that President Obama is in danger of losing California, Oregon or Washington.

Jon: MORE LIKE A WEST COAST DEFENSE THEN.  BUT YOU GOT THESE SWING STATES, THEY CAN GO EITHER WAY.  KIND  OF LIKE CHARLES WOODSON.  THIS CHARLES, I’D  CALL HIM SRIRACHA BECAUSE I COULD USE HIM FOR ANYTHING.

Herm: SRIRACHA GOES IN SOUP.  SRIRARCHA GOES IN POPCORN.  AIN’T NOTHING THAT CAN’T USE SRIRACHA.

Jon: SO NATE, WHICH STATE IS MOST LIKE CHARLES WOODSON?

Nate: I, I don’t know.  I guess Florida because it’s the most difficult to predict right now.

Jon: FLORIDA.  I USED TO WORK AT A HOOTERS IN TAMPA YOU KNOW.  THEN I CAME BACK AS THE HEAD COACH OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM.  THE ONLY FORMER HOOTERS COOK WHO ACHIEVED MORE THAN ME WAS THE BTK KILLER.

Herm: WHEN YOU KILL TEN PEOPLE, YOU MAKE THE FRONT PAGE.

Jon: I CALLED THE BTK KILLER LOMBARDI BECAUSE HE WAS ALL ABOUT DISCIPLINE.  NATE, WHICH CAMPAIGN HAS HAD MORE DISCIPLINE?

Nate: Well if you look at President Obama he’s had the most consistent focus on swing states.  Mitt Romney has been going to Pennsylvania even though there is scant proof that he has a chance of winning there.

Jon:  YOU KNOW WHO ELSE COULDN’T WIN IN PENNSYLVANIA? RICH KOTITE. THIS RICH, I CALLED HIM ALF LANDON.  GREAT GUY, IN A BIT OVER HIS HEAD.  FROM STATEN ISLAND SO I HOPE HE’S NOT EATING OUT OF A DUMPSTER NOW.  THE ONLY COACH I KNEW WHO ATE OUT OF A DUMPSTER WAS ROD MARINELLI.

Herm: YOU GO 0-16 AND YOU CAN’T EVEN GET A TABLE AT DENNY’S.

Jon: WELL THANKS NATE SILVER.  THAT’S IT FOR GRUDEN TALK.  PLAY US OFF, HERM EDWARDS 7!

Herm: RIDE LIKE THE WIND BY CHRISTOPHER CROSS ON 3!  1-2-3 RIDE LIKE THE WIND!