The New York Post’s Steve Serby, wacky topical punster beloved by the worst of all sportswriters, attempted a foray into the world of invented satirical NFL dialogues, a practice that crass, juvenile blogs have traded on for years and years. Surely, a professional writer with a bent for the ridiculous should be able to pull off a fictional conversation between Rex Ryan and Tom Coughlin with no problem at all. Here is but a taste:

Tom: “I’m worried about my team, to be honest with you, Rex. We’re trying to build a bridge.”

Rex: “Hey, speaking of bridges, I could probably walk across one now and not have it collapse (laugh out loud). Too bad Brandon Jacobs isn’t still with you, he wouldn’t be telling me, ‘Shut up, Fatboy,’ there’s no doubt (laugh out loud). Hey, how was training camp?”

LAUGH OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!!!

Killed it, Serby. Only a true pro would think to put a laugh track within a blog post.