The kings of VHS-era video detritus over at Everything is Terrible! have this clip of dearly departed roid rage OG Lyle Alzado’s workout tape from 1984. And boy, is it ever from 1984. The short shorts, the high socks and THAT F*CKING “WAR WITH THE WEIGHTS” song. There’s a Carl Weathers bodybuilder cop movie contained within that chorus.

I want an mp3 of that track so, so badly. I’ll blast it in my iPod at the gym while curling five-pound free weights and giving everyone a strained face. “What’re you people just standing around for? There’s a war going on. With the weights. I’m liberating them from the rack, but they just don’t wanna be free.”