“Quick, now swim in this random person’s koi pond!”

The Dolphins, not long ago just another forgettably awful team, are now well on their way to being high in the running for Distraction Champions. And that’s wonderful. We encourage more bad teams to have the courtesy to being extra clusterf*cky for our amusement.

When it was announced last week that the team would be the surprise subject of “Hard Knocks”, one of the upsides people (read: bros) noted would be the likely presence of Lauren Tannehill, the comely 24-year-old wife of reach-tastic first-round pick Ryan Tannehill. That’s still the case, though it turns out guys won’t need premium cable for an opportunity to ogle her this summer, as Lauren recently posed for an upcoming issue of Maxim, the preferred lad mag of high school boys with serious porn filters on their computers, as well as several other certain subsets of douchebags. And while this latest bit of news won’t detract any more from Miami’s legit shot at winning six games, it is another example of the ‘Phins drawing headlines for everything but being successful on the field.

As you can see in the photos from the shoot, Lauren will be doing such highly attractive football wife appropriate things, such as “holding a football”, “wearing team colors” and “being all bangin’ but kinda classy about it”.

Update: Apparently Maxim says this shoot isn’t for them after all. Eh, either way. We have the photos regardless where they ultimately get published.