From: Vince Young
Date: May 1, 2012 7:14:15 PM
Subject: Bells QB

Deer Bells

Can I get $$$$$ 4 being a QB? pLS?

VY

From: Sarah Phillips
Date: May 1, 2012 7:35:23 PM
Subject: Bills QB

Vince,

Buddy Nix asked me to send you the terms of your employment in writing prior to receiving the employment contract. Please consider this a legally binding agreement.

You, [Vince], will be employed by FauxBills LLC. Your pay will be based on percentage of game viewership. For example, if FauxBills.com generates $500,000 in revenue in October, and you contribute 10% of the total viewership with your content/play, then you will receive $50,000 for that month.

You will lede memes across all sports. You will be required to produce, on average, 5-10 memes per day.

Thanks!

Sarah Phillips

From: Vince Young
Date: May 1, 2012 8:01:05 PM
Subject: Re: Bells QB

Wut is a meem? Is that Bells term 4 snaps? iS this inCEntive contract? That cool. I take it. just Give me a opprtunitea?

VY

From: Sarah Phillips
Date: May 1, 2012 8:29:50 PM
Subject: Re: Bills QB

Vince,

My goal with this project is raise $500 million a year in annual revenue. Unfortunately, we have a few limitations that make that difficult to achieve. For example, the Bills are a small-market team and lack the resources that many other teams have at their disposal. If you could PayPal me, say, $3-$4 million, that would assist us to generate more ad space and get the project off the ground. This is really important. I work for the Bills, so I would know. Also, if you know anyone who can provide a new stadium, that would be of help.

Sarah Phillips

From: Vince Young
Date: May 1, 2012 9:03:10 AM
Subject: $$$$$

Sent

VY

From: Sarah Phillips
Date: May 2, 2012 12:03:11 AM
Subject: Re: $$$$$$$$$$$$

Vince,

The organization has taken on a few expenses necessary to remain competitive in a tough, high-stakes field. To be honest, we’re spending beyond our means, but that’s what it takes in this market. I wouldn’t ask unless it were absolutely necessary, but we will need you to turn over your bank account and routing number so we extract funds that you owe us. Last year I bet big on the Eagles after your Dream Team proclamation. We got clobbered and you can start to make it up to us now.

Sarah Phillips

From: Vince Young
Date: May 2, 2012 3:45:18 AM
Subject: $$$$$$ info

[Financial info for three bank accounts as well as social security number and home alarm codes redacted]

VY

From: 5Chan
Date: May 2, 2012 6:17:33 AM
Subject: HAXXXXXXXXXXOOORRRRREEEEDDDD

BHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I’M IN YR BANK ACCUNTZ, CLEANING OUT YR MONEYZ! FUCKIN OWND BITCH

What kind of newb falls for that shit? THE FUCKTARDEST NEWB, THAT’S WHO! I already diverted all your assets to off-shore accounts. I transferred ownership of your cars and houses over to Casey Anthony. Thanks for power of attorney. I’d say you have nothing, but I let you keep Vince Young Meats because it’s GHEY. HAHAHAHAHAH ALL YOU GOT LEFT IS FAGGY MEATS

WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HAXOREDDDDDD

From: Vince Young
Date: May 2, 2012 6:48:15 AM
Subject: YaY Bells

U sound Xcited. I am Xcited. Glad 2 B on the teem. When dO I start?

VY

Ps – need ryde 2 practice. dont own stuff N.E. more