In case you need to get caught up on the NFL goings-on from over the weekend, you’re in luck – nothing much happened. Yup, it’s still the middle of May. Barring inevitable run-ins with the law, it’s gonna be like this for a little while. Anyway, Factory of Sadness corner Joe Haden took a high school senior to her prom, sparing her from being the latest to take a cardboard cut-out of Tebow. DeSean Jackson got pulled over on the way to his own charity event, causing the receiver to kick out all the local media he had invited. As long as cruelty eventually gets paid forward to the media, it’s well worth it. And the ongoing Twitter war of accusatory softness between Osi Umenyiora and LeSean McCoy continued to great fanfare:


Oh dip! Osi said LeSean is a mom! Probably a low blow to make light of an extreme human oddity like that. In other news, Eagles players cobbled together money to get LeSean a trip to the local spa, while Andy Reid chipped in a coupon for “one free day of no cooking or participating in the two-minute offense even though we’re driving to tie in the 4th quarter”.