Happened a little bit ago, but new to me: Eagles offensive lineman Danny Watkins bought his own fire engine, fulfilling the dreams of boys ages 4-7 the world over. Watkins then filmed himself joyriding the truck with the siren running. Even though Watkins has been a occasional firefighter since he was 16, I’m not sure how it’s legal to do that, though I suspect it probably isn’t. At the very least, the siren part. Anyway, if he’s got some free time, there are probably some passed out Phillies fans in D.C. who could use some assistance.

- Giants players pelted Eli Manning with bananas at the team practice facility on Monday to rag on Elisha for his antics on SNL. Sure, but when Spanish soccer fans do it, it’s suddenly wrong.

- THASSS RACIS of the day: Redskins safety DeJon Gomes said that he has been mistaken for RGIII around D.C. on five occasions since the draft. Why can’t people look beyond skin color and dreads and instead look to the content of our silly socks?

- Aaron Rodgers and Ryan Braun are teaming up to open their own restaurant. Expect championship belt and botched piss test themes to be prevalent.

- OH NOES, you guys. Cris Carter said a naughty word on an otherwise unwatchable ESPN show. Heavens! Imprecations on the airwaves! Knowing ESPN, they’ll hold this for the first C’MON MAN segment of the season in September.

- Reminder that Terrell Owens will be appearing on this afternoon’s episode of Dr. Phil so he can be confronted by the mothers of three of his children and most likely experience another notable public T.O. crying jag. Get your popcorn/bon-bons ready, daytime TV viewers.