I started to read this potent hate bait on NFL.com from former Boston Herald troll Ian Rapoport about how he thinks Tim Tebow should quit football this very day and begin plotting his future reign over American politics. Actual line: “W.W.T.D.? No, it’s more like, W.C.T.D.? As in, What Could Tebow Do in the world if he didn’t have football to worry about?”

How about W.W.I.R.G.M.B.A.D.S? As in, Why Won’t Ian Rapoport Get Mouthf*cked By A Double-Headed Scythe? Longish and clunky, but words to live by.

I’d be the first to celebrate Tebow leaving football but this is just a poor excuse to pretend he’s a transformative figure because he got a crowd the size of a basketball arena to come hear him stump about Jeebus on Easter in a full-publicized event.

Naturally, I called for my FJM hat and tried to get myself in the mood to tear apart yet another in a series of half-baked calls for Tebow to rule us theocratic despot, but after suffering through enough of these, I long for the catharsis of seeing actual death and not just wishing hypothetical demise on some hack. So it’s a Kill Kill Kill clip for your enjoyment and my sanity.

In it, a pack of buffalo chase off a mother lion so they kill off her children. You just got 5Chan’d, Lions. Your whole draft class wiped out like that.