Name: Prince Amukamara
Position: Cornerback and heir to the throne of Zamunda.
Major: Political science, although Wikipedia lists it as sociology. I’m pretty sure Wikipedia assumes all college athletes major in sociology.
Who wants him: Lisa’s sister Patrice.
Who will take him: Dallas.
Entourage: Semmi, Oha, and the chick from Spin City who washes the royal penis. [NSFW]
New Experiences: Recently tied his own shoes for the first time. His father was right, it was an overrated experience.
Mainstream Comparison: Nnamdi Asomugha, and not because their parents were born in the same country. That’s just silly.
KSK Comparison: Antoine Winfield, because he excels in run support and knows how to without simply throwing his body at the ball carrier’s knees.
Immediate impact: Locks down one side of the field for whichever team drafts him.
Down the road: Gets the girl and helps a couple of down on their luck commodity traders get back in the game.
I want more like this!
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