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"LOLNFL: Divisional Playoff Weekend"
The first one wins.
Alternate caption to #1: Yes, Mister Rodgers, your Tab A goes into my Slot B…over and over and over.
Overheard on Simmon’s Podcast (seriously, what a gig):
1) Patriots needed a pass rusher
2) Patriots needed a ” blue chip ” WR
Oh you mean like Richard Seymour and Randy Moss?
3) If the Pats had Dez Bryant (who they passed on in the draft), the outcome would’ve been different. (Never mind he’s injured)
I though unc fans were delusional. And that cock-gobbler with the annoying voice gets PAID for that nonsense?
I wanted the jets to win for 2 reasons.
A) I fucking hate the Pats and all the Tawwwmys of the world. II) Was just imagining the greatness that will be the this week’s Rex post.
/fighting off an anticiparection
If you wear earmuffs, you can not attempt smack talk. Dems the rulez.
#4 is making the Tawmmy pose. Is that a New England thing?
Just from looking at his stupid face and pathetic attempt at a goatee, I want the guy next to the guy making the Tawmmy pose to be run over by a garbage truck. Today if possible.
@Dancing Baptist: I couldn’t agree more.
OK Bill Simmons. Rag on the prima-donna Cowboys all season but then bitch and moan about how your gritty gritsters aren’t talented enough at skill positions while simultaneously extolling the Pats’ grit as the characteristic that makes them better than the hooliganistic Jets or rapealicious Steelers.
Let this be a lesson to all people everywhere: This is what happens when you have too many white players at skill positions. QB? Sure. RB? That’s rare, but why not. WR? Everyone needs a reliable slot guy.
Now here’s a question for you guys: I know this would never happen, but suppose in MagicalLand the Browns offer to trade Peyton Hillis to the Pats for 3 first round picks, Deion Branch and Devin McCourty.
Now tell me with a straight face that every Pats fan wouldn’t jump on that shit like Hines Ward on rice.
It still feels like a holiday today!
The real owner of the Championship Belt is clearly Aaron “Hadouken” Rodgers. Those are some really fugly fake feet there O’Flanakellahanmcmurray. Both Sanders and Braylon had helmet catches this weekend. Pats are doubly sad today.
The connection for the Nakamura sack took me a second, but now that I see it, I find it quite rewarding.
I want the Jets to win the superbowl because I can picture this being Ryan’s on field interview:
“Rex, you just won the superbowl what are you going to do now?”
“I’m gonna go suck my wife’s toes!”
“fluke” – Patriots Fans
I still like the “Tits like that! Tits like this!” A Rodgers M Ryan thing from one of the live blogs.
“FLUKE!” – Patriots fans
“FUCK!!!!” – Ravens fans
I think we need some serious Bart Scott love here at KSK.
I’m almost afraid to point it out, but this is why you guys hate us: In picture four (OM NOM NOM) there is a guy on the bottom right wearing a Celtics jersey OVER a bruins jersey AT A PATRIOTS GAME.
/what, no Red Sox cap?
@ So-sonatas Motiejunas
That’s a bit ridiculous. Obvious racism aside, f you look at their stats, Hillis and Green-Ellis are basically even (each have 4.4 YPC, 4 and 5 runs of 20+ yards, 11 and 13 TDs). Oh, except that Hillis fumbled 8 times this season, and the Law Firm hasn’t fumbled since HIGH SCHOOL. I’m not even kidding, look it up.
Also I wouldn’t trade McCourty for anything in the world. The kid’s fucking ridiculous. If I hadn’t bought a Mayo jersey last year I’d be picking up one of his for sure.
Hey Desmond Bishop, your quarterback resembles a vagina too
He must have taken it off so he could pose for that totally sweet self-portrait on his iPhone.
I was trying to figure out what that guy was wearing. I should have assumed as much.
Wilfork – Hillis had a better season than BGJE. Just saying.
Receptions Hillis: 79 for 675 BJGE: 17 for 133
Total Yards Hillis: 2250 BJGE: 1530
TDs Hillis: 17 rushing 3 receiving BGJE: 18 rushing
I’d point out there’s a bit of a difference in the offensive line too.
Surprised there is none on Matt forte’s interception. Woulda thought that would be an easy one.
I berieve Smirre rike deep flied lice. We have to cater our mild racism towards both of his ethnicities.
@Sausage – yeah, no difference really. cleveland has a really good run blocking offensive line.
in defense of simmons, randy moss is definitely not a blue chip WR. dude is garbage
Um, Otto, the douchbag in number 4 is looking at the screen. The camera is on the other side. Hell, he probably can’t work the camera anyway.
3 First round picks and 2 players for a RB? Yeah that is some Magicland shit.
Those are Hillis’ career stats.
Wrong 55, thats John Abraham not Desmond Bishop. Rookie mistake.
@Admiral AKbar: Fucking Google.
@Stuart Scott’s Left Eye: Agreed. Apologies for the uneven distribution of good-natured racist jabbing. Gotta work on that.
/is actually very partial to Asians //dick joke
Yeah my bad. Wrong numbers. Point remains though.
Receptions Hillis: 61 for 477 BJGE: 12 for 85
Total Yards Hillis: 1650 BJGE: 1100
TDs Hillis: 11 rushing 2 receiving BGJE: 13 rushing
I’d also say it’s easier to run when you’re team is pass happy, and running almost always comes as a surprise, versus a team whose running back is the only offensive threat.
re: first picture.
How does the conversation in the tattoo parlor go for the design Crabtree has on his arm?
Crabtree: I need something awesome and intimidating. Tattoo artist: Well, you can never go wrong with barbed wire. Crabtree: pfft, that shit is so weak. I want something fresh. TA: How about tribal warband slashes? Crabtree: yeah, thats the stuff, shoulder to wrist bro, shoulder to wrist. People will know that I mean business.
@Just Dave Umm that’s an iPhone 4, and there is a camera on the screen side of the phone…
/I want the Jets to win the superbowl because I can picture this being Ryan’s on field interview:
(slaps Nacho on the ass, HARD)
I’ll grant you that Hillis had a more productive year than Law Firm head-to-head, but you need to factor in how much more the Patriots used other running backs than the Browns did.
Hillis: 270 carries, 77 targets Other Browns RBs: 72 carries, 21 targets
Law Firm: 229 carries, 16 targets Other Patriots RBS: 168 carries, 70 targets
I’d say it’s easier to put up higher counting stats when you get over 100 extra chances, and when you have 78.9% of your backfield’s looks instead the 50.7%.
I’m not trying to downplay Hillis at all, he was fucking awesome measty and saved one of my fantasy teams this year. Just saying Green-Ellis had a good year too, and isn’t a huge step down in per-touch production, and didn’t fumble 8 times. No amount of racism would give up 3 first round picks and a rookie CB who made the Pro Bowl for that.
Nice Hillis debate. McDouchebag traded him away for nothing because he wanted some sexy time with some woman (allegedly)… turns out the woman was Josh’s wifey. So THEN the Donkeys are the worst team in the galaxy on short yardage and for most of the season couldn’t run as well as Stephen Hawking. I certainly hope I don’t sound bitter………
But I digress.
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