Drew Brees HERPED and DERPED and nearly cost his team the game with Gunslinger-style behind-the-back shovel pass monkeyshines, but all was well because with Michael Turner being mostly useless all night, the Falcons offense couldn’t get anything going. That said, a Breesus victory isn’t quite as life-affirming when the announcers bend over suggestively to apologize for his mistakes, as Jaws did tonight, saying that Brees has “amnesia” and that mistakes, even mind-bogglingly terrible ones, never dog him. Someone will have to remind him tomorrow that he has more than 20 interceptions this season.

I haven’t finished crunching the numbers, but I’m fairly certain TEAM NAME is still in playoff contention, but the other TEAM NAME has been eliminated. Will the NFL have to change division alignment if a 0-0 team qualifies for the postseason?

Hybrid cars, not hybrid fans.

There’s no way Atlanta doesn’t greet Michael Vick with a deafening cheer if the Eagles have to come to the Georgia Dome for the NFC Championship Game. There’s really nothing right about this sign.

Looks like the Falcons cram all the costumed dorky road fans into one conveniently torchable row. They must promise free props from “The Walking Dead” set.

Eminently commendable, however, were the Falcons cheerleader camo outfits. I’d ride those tanks any day!!!!

/is crushed under weight of own awkwardness