Christmastime is coming. Unless you’re Jewish, in which case, I really envy you right now. Because Christmas has become just another stupid way for white people to bitch about stuff without realizing how great we really have it. And there’s no better example than this little asshole. Kid has a FUCKING WII sitting in front of him and he wants to cry about how he got books for Christmas.

“That’s not toys! That’s books!”

Those ARE books, you little idiot. That’s great detective work for the spawn of a broken condom. Try reading some of those books. And then get a job.

Michael Vick used to kill dogs, but now he’s good at football again, so we like him now. You’re just a big meanie if you bring up the time that Vick electrocuted animals for sport. Jerk. Good job, Michael! All of America is cheering for you! Even the white people!

We have it pretty good, unless you happen to be a Giants fan. Matt Dodge is your Least for punting it to DeSean Jackson, which I understand is Mexican for “Of The Sean Jackson.” Game over Matt. You’re lucky that Tom Coughlin won’t fire anyone before Christmas. Feliz Navidad, everyone.

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