I can’t say I watched a lot of the Giants-Vikes game, but from what little I did, I could tell I wasn’t missing much. And ESPN seems dedicated to catching you up on all the forlorn looks Brittfar made on the sidelines. Among every other shopworn moment from his thankfully concluded career.


Hard to tell but that hat plays Big K.R.I.T.’s ” Country Shit” on loop.

The regularly scheduled Monday night game wasn’t faring much better until Houston peeled off an amazing comeback to tie the game with a touchdown and two-point conversion with less than 30 seconds on the clock. It being the Texans, though, they had to find a way to blow it. Of course they did. Bastards.

ESPN is better than most about getting ridiculous crowd shots. Hell, you’re lucky if you ever see NFL Network pan a camera through the stands. Normally, that means a few of the most retarded fans make the entire fan base look bad, but man, Houston really brought its tard fan game to a new level on Monday. Just uncanny amounts of fan DERPitude.

YEEEEE HAAAAAWWWWWW I TOOK ALL THE FOAM THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO GO IN THE COLUMBIA SHUTTLE

Scoreboard or mirror?

Good show, Texans. Barbara Bush offers a polite clap for your ability to fail in engaging and entertaining ways. Keep it up and she might no longer advocate for you to be shot into space along with the poor people.


Monday was Mike Tirico’s birthday. The Texans even put up a reminder on the Reliant Stadium scoreboard. The whores. Gruden and Jaws presented Tirico with his own personalized Texans jersey. Mike looks about as thrilled as you might expect.

Another highlight from the booth: Jaws makes the most painfully forced joke of the season. Somebody should run an asshat route next week.