Let’s all thank Brandon Jacobs for having the good sense to toss his helmet into the stands. Had he not, we may never have discovered the stunning creature seen above. And we certainly never would have seen her making this particular face. Continue after the jump for the first of what will likely be many photoshops, this one from reader 12-Man Football.
Elsewhere in the NFL…
-Braylon Edwards did the Dougie.
-Clinton Portis proved once again that he is the best blocking back in the league, even if he only averages 3 yards per carry.
-Rolando McClain mastered the art of the suplex.
-Brett Favre eschewed his beloved Wranglers for some fancy city boy denim.
-Gary Kubiak totally iced the Redskins. Because he’s a dick, you see.
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We have discovered…QUEEN OF THE HUMPS
Immediately following McClain’s tackle, he pulled the straps down and slapped on the Ankle Lock.
There’s no way. There is just no way that is a woman. It’s just not possible *head explodes*
Imagine waking up to that every morning. Some poor bastard does.
NEEEEIIIIIGHHHHH
Yeah, preeeeety sure that’s a dude in a wig.
Four legs good, two legs better.
*sings*: “Manning pig, Manning pig. Does whatever a Manning pig does.”
Wow, Bruce McCullough has really grown his hair out.
Good to see Kenny Chesney finally found true love.
Flawless, seeing a rookie already master the fine art of the supley.
I haven’t seen Tom Hulce make that face since he was directing the second movement of Figaro in Amadeus.
I should have known Rocky Dennis was Colts fan.
That guy hasn’t felt so conflicted as a Colts fan since he sent Boxer to the glue factory.
And I believe I had to chase that cretin in the picture out of my trash the other night.
It looks like the product of Carrot Top and Sasquatch.
Looks like the Republicans forgot to put the lipstick on the pig last night.
Good to see him getting back out on the scene after the tragic death of Charlotte.
Carrot Top?
[www.imdb.com]
I suck at internet stuff.
Yeah, I got nothing. That’s pretty horrific.
That being said, it’s good to see the reemergence of the Colts running game.
[www.rowthree.com]
Soon it will assimilate into our culture but watch out, ladies. It can smell your menstration.
guess the hills really do have eyes…..somebody put that thing down before it bites a child.
That’s not a chick. That’s one of the Damn Yankees, who were in the area after playing a gig at the Vigo County Fair.
Carrot Top has really let himself go.
the chick she is resting her arm on looks OK. BTW did the humps get anything from the Giants for returning the helmet??
This woman is a John Mellencamp song waiting to happen.
Monkey Business’s mom looks really pissed.
I had no idea that the President of the Quiet Riot Fan Club was also a Fat Hump.
I’ve always said that the best way to express displeasure is to sit glumly and point your thumbs south.
Or brace your drunken simian humpself on the head of a teenage female while screaming at shadows.
Both are effective.
Its Cromagna-Shaun White….evolution its a bitch.
She followed the team from Bawlmer to Indy. Is the woman to her lower right about to face palm? And does she have the other woman in front of her by the hair?
The Queen of the Stone Age shown here distracts from the real treasure of this photo: the happy grin and dead eyes of her consort.
This man, after a lifetime of disappointment that is part and parcel of a life lived in suburban Indianapolis, grasps at the one object that will give his life meaning. Never again will he go to supper with the Schultz’s at the Olive Garden, and sit silent while Jim Schultz talks about the fast times down at the cracker factory. Never again will he go to work on Monday morning and sit mouth agape while co-workers describe the glory of their weekend trips to Muncie or Dayton.
No, this man has finally lived. He has the helmet. He will regale the Red Lobster regulars with the story of the time an NFL player blessed his existence with a discarded piece of equipment. And while they eat their famous Indianapolis shrimp cocktails, he’ll revel in their covetous stares.
He has the helmet. He has lived.
This is why I drink in the morning. This city sucks.
Glad to see my recommendation for Photoshopping yon creature was picked up.
Besides “It”, it appears as if Lucas Oil is filled with a race of pasty, thin-lipped melatonin-deprived subhumans. Who knew Morlocks finally came true?
If you look at her/its side, you can see the rough stitching used on the jersey.
Apparently the Fat Humps really are bursting at the seams in Indianapolis.
I had no idea Lips Kudlow was a Fat Hump.
Christ Allmighty that woman is ugly!
/Chubs a little
Gelfling?
(google this: the dark crystal aughra)
As an aside, shouldn’t a helmet flung into the stands be considered the equivalent of a foul ball ?
Chas Bono’s a Colt’s fan ! Love his new hair. Go Humps !
God it just can’t stop..I heard that thing was a stand in on a Jack Links commercial. And did it try to eat the helmet by any chance or just do what comes natural and put it on with the harness?
Look for this to appear in Carrot top’s next performance.
/pulls helmet from prop trunk.
“I’m a shitty backup running back.”
“I’m fantasy football kryptonite.”
“Keep the helmet. I’m getting suspended anyways.”
Talk about an ugly scene, literally.
and Dungy still doesn’t believe in evolution?!
[www.luminomagazine.com]
She’s been using Troy Polamalu’s shampoo !
@DoubleViking: I’m glad I wasn’t the only one to notice that.
So, does the She-Cromag have to be stuffed into that jersey like stuffing a sausage with too much meat? And not only does s/he have a DIY stitch running up the jersey, it’s done with the skill of a blind twelve year old seamstress!
Curious minds want to know!
After looking at that caveman photo I nearly shit myself. That’s great hustle!
/Slaps maj on ass, hard.
KILL IT WITH FIRE
Remember when Monkey Business regaled us with tales of the lovely redhead he was making sweet love with?
@Chut Up: You win at KSK.
@Clamps: You win at life.
l think she’s in the middle of saying as***le!!!
Wow, Bruce McCullough has really grown his hair out.
We have a winner. Well played.
No matter how sexy a lady is somebody somewhere is sick of her shit.
The DS iTeam needs to find this hump. I have to know.
So that is what a survivor of fetal alcohol syndrome looks like, KILL IT!
I believe she’s Monkey Business’s sister, Orangutan Business.
I’m sure I’ll screw this up:
Coming Soon:
[IMG]http://i56.tinypic.com/2m51fde.jpg[/IMG]
Yup.
Here’s the link then
[tinypic.com]
*sigh*
..and without that extra crap, jeebus I’m a comment-tard.
[i56.tinypic.com]
Dear KSK sexbag, I’m a Colts fan and I’ve meet this redhead who is also a huge Colts fan. Is it OK to pursue this or should I stick to the “friend zone.”
After seeing her mating call, you really don’t want to see what comes next.
“You WILL fill this helmet with nacho cheese! And NOW!”
The worst part? She told her boss at the crystal meth lab that he was too sick to work Sunday night.
*she was too sick
/Fuck this IPhone and fuck my work firewall for making me resort to commenting with an iPhone.
I heard Childress was trying to sign her as protection for Favre.
Holy shit that’s a WOMAN?!?!?!?!?!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
/Runs off in tears
//Colts denizens have no idea why I don’t want a piece of that
///Sad face continues…
Somewhere Al Gore has sprung back into action lobbying the DoD to create plans for extermination of ManBearPig.
/Excelsiorrrr
@Clamps: +76
ManningBearPig
If this doesn’t convince Christians that evolution is a fact then nothing will.
Who knew Joe Piscopo was a Colts fan?
@ Chazz_Goodtimes – No, no….you had it right the first time.
Now I remember where I’ve seen this creature….
[www.hsp.org]
Where is J.T. O’Sullivan to mete out savage recompense to this brigand Nast?
Oh right….he’s dead.
Somehow this thing is twice as frightening as mouth eyes.
the sad thing is, as a resident of fathumpland, i am inured to this sort of devastating beauty, and did not even bat an eye until it was pointed out
//plucks own eye out with shrimp fork, shows to self//
Wow.. that fat hump got so fat that she ripped her jersey and what it looks like, tried to stitch it back up with the thickest white shoe lace that you can find. I’m applying for residencies right now and I pray to god I don’t have to go to Indiana.
Perhaps too obvious, but it needs to be done. Moutheyes:
[i109.photobucket.com]
clmetsfan +10, just pissed where i sit
Chazbot, burn in hell.
The Great Conjunction is the ENND OF THE WOOORLD! Or the beginning! Hmp!
[www.bookmice.net]
Aughra fo sho.
The golem wants the crowd to keep the precious….
She could have even been the actress who played Precious…
//Will get back when I found out the truth….oh and YOU SHALL NOT PASS
JESUS CHRIST. I barfed. As a fat hump myself, who is actually pretty decent looking, I apologize to everyone on behalf of this…..this…..thing. Please, don’t judge us based on the appearance of one…….woman. I know everyone will, but please, dont. I happen to know one of the Colts cheerleaders personally. I’ll see if I can find a pic of her somewhere and distract you all with her beauty.
One magical night, long long ago, Carrot Top took the love seed of John C. Reilly, and bore him a son. And that son is Jebus, King of the Fat Humps.
/blasphemy = comedy
//just puked in mouth a little
Too late Carl, Colts cheerleaders are not from Indianapolis they are shipped in from less ugly bordering cities and states
I was hoping there would be a post about this maiden of Indianapolis.
/ “she/it” totally gave me a rock hard erection
// jerked off multiple times thinking about the unbridled fat hump
/// then ate pop tarts
btw, how ’bout those bears????
That’s a guy in a wig right?
Thats one evil-looking leprechaun.
[www.gabrielglewis.com]
And the kids above her look like they were bussed in from the Manning School of Derp.
Gingervitis:
[i56.tinypic.com]
I was going to comment on that “lady” in the Manning jersey, but that topic seems to have garnered enough steam on its own. Holy fuck!!! A thanks to everybody above who has spoken on this subject.
I am a woman. That ain’t no woman.
is that Shambo from Survivor?
[i.ytimg.com]
or this guy?
[1.bp.blogspot.com]
Wow, it’s that kid from Mask, all grown up.
If They Mated: Sloth from The Goonies + aborted fetus edition.
fuck off beautiful people. her passion is a turn on.
You can’t spell Dougie without DUI, eh Braylon?
So that’s what Sarah Palin looks like without makeup
Apparently this is the mother of a guy I went to college with. Hails from southern IL. Hilarious
I believe this is Mrs. Gabriel Gonzaga