Jesus H., people. I thought KSK Kares had a reasonable chance of hitting $10,000 for Fight Gone Bad by the end of the week, but I obviously underestimated the spirit of generosity among the readership. Or your bloodthirsty desire to see video of me dying while wearing hot pink stripper shorts. Whatever, the bottom line is that it’s for a good cause.

Anyway, to update you on the official tally: we went from zero to nearly $7000 in the span of 36 hours, which has catapulted me to the #1 individual fundraiser for Fight Gone Bad and my hometown¬†CrossFit South Brooklyn to the #2 overall gym. That kind of support is both astounding and preposterous, and I thank you for it. And just as soon as Fight Gone Bad contacts me about the free iPad…

…then I will send it off to KSK reader Sanjay M., who made a remarkable and generous donation of $650. I will try to forward the iPad on to him without getting too many fingerprints on it first.

I’ll announce another winner tomorrow, but for now the frontrunner looks to be Taylor B., who mistakenly paid rent to my donation page. To everyone else who isn’t wealthy: every little bit pushes me closer to public humiliation, so keep the 5-, 10-, and 20-dollar donations coming. Also, a reminder: $150 gets you books and drinks at my apartment. And yes, if there’s booze in it, I can make it and make it well.

Finally, I happen to know that exactly 82 awesome people have donated so far, and yet KSK averages about 30,000 readers a day. STOP HOLDING OUT, SCROOGE.