I could ignore some cuckoo bananas for that.
In December 2009, Chris Chambers claimed in court papers that Stacey Bernice Saunders was stalking him and had made “abusive, vulgar and irrational” communications towards Chambers, his wife, and his wife’s family. Now, less than a year later, Chambers has divorced his wife and married Saunders. According to PigskinLovingLady.com (not a pork-rind fan site, sorry to say), the wedding took place recently in Las Vegas.
At the time of the alleged stalking, Chambers played for the San Diego Chargers, but shortly thereafter he was released and signed with the Kansas City Chiefs. I can’t help but feel that Chambers change of heart and change of locale are related. Thus raising the question, is KC so bereft of quality single women that men would rather marry a stalker than date a local? Yes, yes it is.
Unfortunately for the newlyweds, relationships founded on this level of emotion are often doomed. Sure, Chambers and his new special lady may be loving life right now. But give it a few months.
“How come you don’t hide in my bushes with a boning knife anymore?”
“Because I live here now. How come you don’t warn people ‘Watch dat bitch, she crazy!’ no more?”
“Aw, c’mere baby. I’m sorry.”
/commence psycho codependent batshit looney tunes sex
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
Tell me you love me! Mean it! Mean it!
Having come from San Diego to Kansas City myself, I can truthfully report that the drop-off in the quality of women is immense. All the hot ones here are married and popping out kids by age 25, leaving us 30-something bachelors with a sad assortment of retreads and leftovers from which to choose.
“psycho codependent batshit looney tunes sex” is the best, however, is not conducive to longevity. Dem crazy bitches be reachin’ for the knife drawer. Ever woken up in the middle of the night with your woman standing next to the bed with a BIG knife? And you know she ain’t baked no cake. Uhm Hmm. You can’t trust that crazy bitch because she ain’t never gonna trust you.
Sheeit, we could use a whole mailbag on psycho codependent batshit looney tunes sex.
@Cooper
Does she drive a pick up truck?
she is gonna kill him……..I see it coming.
I bet he was having an affair with her from the beginning. He just used stalking so his wife at the time would not become suspicious!!
“Thus raising the question, is KC so bereft of quality single women that men would rather marry a stalker than date a local? Yes, yes it is.”
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM????
FLUBBY…You may want to talk to someone about your issues of a broken heart by a KC lady…get over it…KC is full of smart and beautiful women….we are OBVIOUSLY not what he was looking for – he has exactly who he deserves….
“Thus raising the question, is KC so bereft of quality single women that men would rather marry a stalker than date a local? Yes, yes it is.”…..
OOOOOOOOO.KKKKKKKKK…..where did THAT come from?
FLUBBY….sorry that your heart obviously was broken in KC but I think it is time to get over it. Kansas City is full of smart, intelligent and beautiful women…the type he OBVIOUSLY wasn’t looking for. Speaking for all the women of KC, we are not offended that he chose the stalker – she did us a favor…
I agree with Sunny and Jack’n4beats, This is just CRAZY, These “Football” players are lame as hell! They are ignorant as hell when it comes to anything other than running, jumping, catching & tackling! I cant wait til this right here falls apart…..This is a “classic” example of why these dudes end up broke!
Ummm….FLUBBY…what’s up with the slam to Kansas City women? Where did THAT come from??? Maybe you need to talk to somebody about it….whoever she was, she OBVIOUSLY had an impact on you….yeah, we tend to do that.
@Monkey Business
Did you see that the Saints had Shrimp Cocktail at the White House the other day? BWAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I read on another website that the story was more involved. He and “the stalker/now current wife” were having an affair when he was with the last wife and when his wife found out about it, he broke it off with “the stalker/current wife”. She then went ballistic and indeed began to harrass not only him but his wife and her family, ergo the court order. At some point, like all smart gold-diggers do, she convinced him to leave his family (I’m sure through logic…) which included divorcing not only his wife, but also leaving his kids, for a woman who had been making their lives a living hell. Gotta love football players…
I think Castor nailed it…almost as well as Chambers nailed his jump-off/stalker/wife. But another theory is Chambers didn’t want to end up like Steve McNair all “holed up” and everything so he figured, let me marry this crazy bitch so she can keep the gun locked up in the basement.
/the more you know
For sure they were foolin around before, and when they were found out, he told his wife it was a stalker. First thing I thought, even before you I read your other brilliant readers who also deducted that!
Remember, new wife…he cheated on her, he will cheat on you!
I happen to live in Kansas City and trust me there are plenty of beautiful women here. He just apparently wanted to marry him. Have you ever thought that maybe he lied about her stalking him so his wife wouldn’t figure out he is a dog? I never even heard of him before or knew he was signing to the chiefs. So he ain’t HOT no way!
with bbq like that in kc, you really dont need bitches.
So….he went to KC and ummm… “imported” her?
She had a shiv hid in the bouquet of flowers….
WHO KNEW!!???
Can I put in a request to hit the “reset” button on everything?
Shit is wrong.
Maybe in our next incarnation we can be a plant or some fucking thing.
There is no way this next generation or two accomplishes anything greater than a twelve pound dump. Fuck!
Mikey? Do you have my Metamucil?
Good call Castor, Fatal Attraction would have sucked if it followed that script.
Come on Castor, you know the only thing promised Chambers by the ‘stalker’ was anal.
My guess: he got caught with Ms. Saunders at some point during the original marriage. And then he did what any rational man would do: claim his side-piece was a “stalker” who wouldn’t leave him alone.
Hell, he may have even worked it out with Saunders that he’d make these claims in court in return for something. More attention (in secret, of course), money, promises of eventually marrying her (and that the restraining order was just a ploy to buy more time). At some point, he decided he wanted to make his affair into a new marriage. And, bam, she’s no longer a stalker.
Hope his house has fire insurance.
/Andre Rison
Crazy + stalker can equal crazy sex but you should never, ever, ever allow crazy bitch to handcuff you to a bed.
You hear me, Chris! NO handcuffs!
DO YOU NOW REALIZE WHAT WE COULD HAVE HAD HALLE BERRY?
//eye twitch
This just might replace the ‘cat hanging from a tree’ photo for the “PERSISTENCE” motivational poster.
Not really a joke, but I’m really curious to know how she went from stalker to lover? How did that transition happen? Did he just notice her in his bushes one day and realize she was the one? This story is very intriguing.
So does the marriage license over-rule the restraining order? Did they get a temporary stay for the wedding? Kind of fucked up that your wife has to stay at least 500 feet away…………….hey, wait a minute!!
Chris Chambers may be a genius. Or at least a rain man kind of genius when it comes to marriages.
This can’t end well.
@Monkey Business
So it’s not all wine and roses like that fat hump Indy poon?
Overweight AND crazy?
That BJ must be insane.
Same thing happened in The Fan. DeNiro and Snipes ended up getting married, too.
And here I am trying to foster a mature relationship like a sucker!
Now, where did I put my night-vision goggles?
Couldn’t find a pork rind fan site that wasn’t on facebook. Closest thing I could find was IloveBacon.com but it has nothing to do with bacon. I can’t believe there’s false advertising on the internet.
Thanks for the link back but what the heck is a pork rind fan site? lol
I once lived in Kansas City.
I would have gladly taken just about anything. Crazy bitches included.
Just when I was giving up hope on mine and Vince Carter’s “relationship”. This woman gives me hope. Sad, desperate, maniacal hope.
Why does my computer suddenly hate Uproxxxxx? Oh wait, my computer hates ME and is mocking my mild retardation.
“Bitch get out my car; I ain’t givin’ you no mo money!”
Shit, so stalking does work.
/cancels mailbag question
“How come you don’t hide in my bushes with a boning knife anymore?”
I’ve been known to hide my boning knife (points to crotch) in bushes.
Don’t google “looney tunes sex.” At least not at work.
I was hoping for more from the ‘stalkers’ tag.
The again, I already know women are crazy, why subject myself to more.
I love the “irrational” bit thrown in there.
“Bitch failed to agree with my well-reasoned arguments that she be crazy.”